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Veelansu's Journal

Discussion in 'My Optimal Journal' started by veelansu, Sep 30, 2013.

  1. caroline

    caroline Moderator

    Vee - did you eat the heart raw? I love Hawaii - have a wonderful couple of days soaking up the rays!

    So glad your Mom is doing better.... xo
     
  2. veelansu

    veelansu New Member

    No, I cooked it but very rare. I'm not brave enough to eat it raw yet. :)

    Mom is doing great. I'm already making arrangements to bring her here.

    For some reason the past two day, I've had crazy cravings for chocolate. Today I ate about 2/3s of a bar. 60% dark organic. But still the sugar in the bar had kicked me out of ketosis for sure. I haven't checked yet. I was doing so good not craving sweets and then bam! Not sure what happened. I'm not sure if I'm leptin sensitive or leptin resistant. I just cannot tell. I'm wondering because I'm not sure if I have to start the post leptin reset way of eating. Will it hurt if I keep eating as the leptin reset states if I've fixed my leptin pathways? I'm hoping not, since that's what I'm going to keep doing until early next year. The holidays will more than likely make it hard to stay on track. I won't be home for thanksgiving as I'm going to get mom. Xmas and New Years I will be, so it will make it easier.

    Didn't eat dinner because that huge bar of chocolate at 2 pm took away my hunger completely. Weird.

    My daughter is staying with me for a few weeks. I'm forcing her to eat my way. I'm hoping she can get used to it and keep it up on her own. She seems to be fine with it since she doesn't have to do anything but eat. :) I cook, I clean.

    Other than that, things are hunky dory.
     
  3. caroline

    caroline Moderator

    Hi Vee! I think women crave chocolate on a deep primal level sometimes ..... that is my story and I am sticking to it...LOL

    Have you tried the Lindt 85% .... and others on here talk about 95% - I cant find that one...

    so glad that your Mom is doing great.....

    I will have to have a look at - after the leptin reset......can't remember what it says. I do know you can stop stuffing yourself with so much protein. Have a look at C/T #7 ....It is about why we do all of that kinda!.....basic stuff ......

    I really had forgotten some of the why.....or maybe I just care more about the why now!

    JK mentioned that this blog is a precursor for transition metals etc.
     
    Last edited: Nov 14, 2013
  4. veelansu

    veelansu New Member

    Okay, so I did the chocolate thing again yesterday at dinner. Was so sick after, it gave me the runs. I think it's just because it's there, that's why I eat it. And once I start, I can't put it down. I'm not buying chocolate anymore. I'm done with it for a while. Getting ready for my 3 weeks away from home. I'm looking forward to being away from work but I hate that I won't be anywhere I can eat right. I will do my best as I have been doing, I just feel like it makes me stall and not progress. And I'm either living in a hotel with no kitchen or in someone else's home with no control. Ugh!

    I started losing weight again after my 2 month stall. It's a lot slower than when I first started but I guess that's normal for any weight loss.

    Caroline, I've read what to do next, I'm just not sure if I should. I'll probably wait until next year. I want to get my thyroid meds down to 2 grain and still losing before I switch to post leptin rx. I'm afraid that if I start adding fruits and other non compliant items I'm just going to either stall or gain weight which would be depressing.
     
  5. caroline

    caroline Moderator

    I really would re consider fruits - at any time. Maybe a little in long light cycles and grown in your area. I now kind of think of fruit as mainlining sugar! I have always craved apples - and everyone knows ...an apple a day yada, yada, yada....

    Now I realise, at least for me, I was just craving sugar.

    I can't keep chocolate around either .... and cheese. If I buy cheese I am cooked .... not happy until it is all gone! I just can't stop .... and I hate that. I always promise myself to just have a little ........ what a joke!
     
  6. veelansu

    veelansu New Member

    I have been traveling these past few days. I had to go to Hawaii for work (what torture ;) ). I was walking on the beach away from the crowds of Waikiki. I found a little area that was isolated on the east coast of Oahu. I had my feet in the water, just staring into the horizon, not thinking, not moving, just living in the moment. It was so great. Then I look down at my feet, and take a step and I realize, a sea turtle is at my feet swimming in the shallow water, not 6 inches away. I was so amazed! It was such a beautiful experience. I almost cried. I watched it swim away and keep bobbing it's head as it swam back and forth. I took my phone out of my pocket and waited. Soon, it came right back to me! I took a picture of it, so close to me. Beautiful.

    Now I am on the gulf coast for Thanksgiving. I will be in Alabama for the next few days. I have been staying as close to the diet as I can. I've been eating mostly seafood, oysters, shrimp, etc. I am not sure that will be the case for thanksgiving dinner. I will be eating at a friend's family's and I doubt I will have anything I can really eat so I may have to do the best I can. Then I go to Florida to pick up my mom from the rehab facility and bring her to live with me in San Diego. I'm so happy that I can do this for her. It will be life changing but I know rewarding as well.

    Work on the other hand is not as rewarding. I need to try to find joy in what I do again. I used to love it, not so much anymore. Not sure why.

    I'm still losing weight, not so much this week. It's slowed down but still headed in the right direction.

    I will be getting new labs when I get back home in December. I am hoping my testosterone and SBHG have stabilized as well as trying to see where my thyroid numbers are. Can't wait to see if I'm making a difference in my labs.

    I hope everyone has a great Thanksgiving. I don't think I will be back on the forum until early December.
     
  7. caroline

    caroline Moderator

    Have a wonderful thanksgiving Vee......
     
  8. veelansu

    veelansu New Member

    Okay, I finally feel like I'm settled after the whirlwind of a life I have been living. My mom is comfortably settled in my apartment. Most of her boxes we brought are empty and organized. I don't remember if I mentioned this in another post, but the other shoe dropped right about the same time. My daughter decided to leave her girlfriend of two years, so with no where to go, she came to live with me too. She's sharing my extra bedroom with my mom. It's been a busy busy few months. But life for me is starting to stabilize to a new norm. I've not been able to be strict in my eating habits but have not been very bad. I have lost only 2 lbs since thanksgiving but that's a good thing as I'm going in the right direction. I wanted to start eating fruit so I have added an orange about once a week to get my cravings down. I also started eating tomatoes every now and again. I have not done labs since late October so I will get them done in January. I want to see how my hormones are behaving. I feel fine so I don't expect significant changes from last time. I do hope my SHBG is down and my free T is up some. If not I'm going to have to figure out what else I may have to do to fix those mismatched numbers. I'm very positive about 2014. I'm going to continue to fix my health. I am looking to be more involved in my community. I have been so career focused that I never had time to volunteer or do anything other than work. This year I'm hoping to change all that, especially with my mom here, she needs to get out so volunteering together will help us both. I'm off work for the next two weeks so I'll be on the forum more often. Can't wait to catch up on all that I have missed.
     
  9. caroline

    caroline Moderator

    Hi Vee .....I can't wait to hear more of what you are up to! I am so glad that everything is working out. You must have a big apartment. .... Three women .....yikes!

    Merry Christmas ....xo
     
  10. nicld

    nicld Gold

    Wow, grandmother and granddaughter sharing the same room, how is that going? You are really a sandwich generation care giver. Wish you lots of peace this Christmas season and beyond.
     
  11. veelansu

    veelansu New Member

    Hahaha! I just read my last post and I just have to laugh. I thought things would slow down but not even close. Three women in one apartment is truly an experience. That, plus lots of doctor's appointments for my mom, dealing with my daughter's social life spilling in, and work has been a real challenge for me. There is just not enough hours in the day for all that I now have to do. It's funny how life just happens. One day, I'm sitting in my apartment, meditating, wearing my blue blockers, reducing EMFs, eating healthy, and then.... BAM! My life is tipsy turvy. Nothing I can't handle thank goodness. The holidays were rough from a food perspective, but I found it was easy to go back to eating healthy. I gained 4 lbs between Xmas and first week of January. But I buckled down after that and I was able to lose them again. I'm now at the same weight I was before the holidays. It's funny how fast I can put on weight, and that it takes twice as long to lose it.

    I'm getting back into doing all the things I can with the time that I have. I have to figure out a way to get some me time. I was thinking of going to hotel once a month to just spend the day alone. I miss being alone, completely alone. I have not gotten my labs yet. I should have them done this month or see how things are going. Well, that's all for today. I'm hoping I don't disappear again but I cannot plan anything anymore. Life just takes over.
     
  12. caroline

    caroline Moderator

    Hi, Hi, Hi,!!! glad you popped in - I have missed you! :)

    Have you registered for the free 90 day optimal reset?

    A hotel once a month sounds like such a great idea - one with a spa and hot tub and a nice restaurant...... and a massage....

    How is your Mom doing?
     
  13. veelansu

    veelansu New Member

    Well, it's been over a year since my last post. I have to say my life has changed some. My mom moved back to Florida. My daughter found a nice boy, they decided to move in together and have had a baby since then. A little girl. I moved to Baltimore, MD from San Diego. The job has not stopped being stressful. The good thing is that I found a great doctor that has been helping me get my health in order, no more doing it by myself, blind with just a flashlight the is the internet. She has ordered all the blood, urine, stool and saliva tests necessary to see what is going on in this body of mine. I am gluten intolerant so that has been validated, my thyroid is acting wacky and so are my adrenals. My sex hormones were a mess, she's gotten them to a better level, so my SHBG is at normal levels now. She's helped me with getting at least 8 hours of good sleep a night. I have an app that I track my sleep with and it shows that I am doing a whole lot better than I did before. I used to always wake up a few times during the night, awake as in aware that I was awake. Not anymore. Now it happens rarely and maybe once around the 4 am time frame. Stress from work tends to be a trigger, but not much I can do about that. Melatonin helps a lot and along with the blue blockers are magic. My cholesterol is still not as good as it should be, my gut bacteria needs help, so I am megadosing some probiotics. I am still overweight even though I don't eat junk. I have been eating kind of paleo (no grains, no legumes, etc) I love fruit so I eat that even though I think the sugar in the fruit may be an issue. I avoid white sugar in anything I eat. I eat a mix of proteins beef, pork, fish, lamb. I don't think I am ketogenic due to the fruit and some other starchy vegetables. She's starting to zero in on my adrenals. I have few results to go over with her sometime next week and hopefully we can get my weight under control. If I concentrate really hard I can lose the weight, it's the keeping it off that is almost impossible. Around November of last year she was able to get me down to 163lbs using HCG. But even with the maintenance program, slowly the weigh came back and by January, I was back at 193lbs. I don't think HCG is the answer if something else is wrong. I have been yo-yoing in weight a lot more in the last 2 years and that, to me, is an indication that something else is up. Just hard to find. I know that this website and all it's advice is helpful and I will continue to read and use it. I just need to get all my body chemistry in shape for it to actually see any progress. I just wanted to provide an update in case anyone was interested :). I think that the best advice I have ever heard on this site is about getting all the right lab tests regularly to see what is actually happening inside. That is the key and having found a doctor that is willing to do that has been a godsend. I wish everyone else luck in their journey to optimal. (I still can't get myself to dunk my head in ice).
     
  14. Jack Kruse

    Jack Kruse Administrator

    You need a pic up too. New rule since you left.
     
  15. nonchalant

    nonchalant Silver

    Veelansu, how about dunking just your face in cool water at first?
     
  16. caroline

    caroline Moderator

    welcome back Veelansu ....I have missed you!
     
  17. nicld

    nicld Gold

    How have made some great gains. Sleeping though the night is the BEST isn't it.

    I agree that HCG does not work the best when there are underlying issues. The weight loss with the first set of rounds did not stay off due to underlying hormonal and circadian issues. Hoping the weight that has come off during these past three rounds will stay off.
     

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