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Two steps forward, one back, repeat!

Discussion in 'My Optimal Journal' started by RobH, Aug 21, 2015.

  1. RobH

    RobH Gold

    I guess I ought to have an optimal journal also. Should keep me accountable I think, and that is necessary when life seems overbusy and I get distracted with the details.

    Here was my first try. When I read through it somehow feels like I need to start it over.


    A lot has transpired since then, and I probably don't have time to go into all of it right now, although bits and pieces are scattered throughout various places in the forum. Suffice to say I've had a couple steps back but I'm moving forward slowly but steadily again.

    Suffice to say the Kruse Cruise was a defining moment. Still working off that momentum.

    Not feeling too optimal right now. Working night shift. Luckily not too busy so I have a little time to catch up on reading, Wim Hof Video, Quantlet videos, etc. Organizing, etc. Drinking a LOT of water, using FLUX on computers and trying to minimize the damage with blue blockers. Nicotine gum not coffee tonight.

    Being here at work is a window into the cognitive and physical devolution of the human race. Sad. I'm don't mind taking care of acutely ill and injured folks, but at night like we see a lot of "frequent flyers" who continue to abuse themselves and are back over and over again for the same self-induced ailments at all hours because it's convenient for them and we are here to serve "with a smile" as mandated by our hospital system and the all important patient satisfaction score. Ultimately it makes me feel abused, frustrated and angry that I am trashing my circadian biology being here to take care of them when I should have been asleep when the sun went down. I know that may shock and horrify some of you, and I may seem uncompassionate (I'm not) or judgmental, but it is hard to give infinitely of yourself (when you know the consequences) to people who don't respect themselves enough to try to do even a little bit better. I spend a lot of time trying to educate and inform, but many see the same ones back again with the same problems. Some people are incorrigible and don't care to get better. Vampires of sorts. There are some (about 20-30%) who need to be here tonight and I am happy to give them everything I can. I guess I need to focus on those and the reason I am here.

    My career evolution plan continues to fall nicely into place...

    I look forward to the day when I know I'll sleep in my own bed (on my magnetico if I can kick the dogs off -- they love it) every night.

    Found a great sale locally on "BBQ" oysters (the big ones) from Willapa Bay, WA today. 50 cents each! Tomorrow's recuperation plan after tonight's circadian insult is a dozen oysters for lunch, a nap in the sun and some CT in the tub if the kids haven't used all the ice by then (now they want ice baths!). Maybe a little targeted red light or time in IR sauna with red lights on. Will start looking into aquarium cooler ala The Quantum Radical.

    Watched Mobilize. No surprises other than the focus on tumors not much on the metabolic and other insidious effects of EMF (although they did mention the mouse experiments and behavioral problems). No phones for our kids despite enormous peer pressure. I wish it would have been surprising but from what I've learned now it is all to be expected. I have diagnosed 3 brain tumors (right sided, right hand dominant folks) in the last 3 months, and I don't work THAT many shifts.

    Thrive next on the list.

    Big stack of books on my desk! Nick Lane's books, Healing Sunlight, etc. Great stuff.

    Fires burning west of us and air is awful this week. Yes, California is a lousy place to be and we won't be here forever, but don't have a solid plan or timeframe yet and pretty heavily invested in a variety of ways so it will take time to extricate. Supposed to be a big El Nino year (RAIN! SNOW!) and we live in a pretty darn nice rural spot (way north) where water isn't such a huge issue ... yet. There are some great water falls, rivers and natural CT spots around us and some amazing wilderness areas. Will have to look hard to find a better spot in many ways. Of course the coming big earthquakes as the central valley sinks (historically not much in our locale, thankfully) could accelerate that process....

    Going to cut way back on coffee... I like it but don't (think) I need it and it seems (thanks Gretchen!) that will be a bit of a biohack for the next few months until my next lab draw. I can live without it.

    I can't wait for winter and our lake to get cold again. Not quite ocean CT but is it pretty nice.

    Got some labs recently. CRP still high (7 -- arrrrggghhh!)(likewise homocysteine) despite DHA every day and sun since the cruise (vit D 50+ no supplements) since the cruise so I need to dig deeper into the EMF in my my work / home environment, maybe look at a few more labs, and needless to say, CTCTCT. I know I'm missing something.

    Oops they're triaging another and I've got to dictate so I can get out of here when relief arrives.

    Sorry about the supposed randomness of these thoughts... gotta (re)start somewhere.

    Thanks to all of you. I appreciate being part of this community.

    Last edited: Aug 21, 2015
  2. nicld

    nicld Gold

    I just read The Healing Sunlight and it is an awesome book. Makes me wonder how we can get back to using the sunlight to heal since we have seem to gone away from it. Hospitals especially need this.

    I now know that when I build my next house, it will be built to maximize the sun.
  3. caroline

    caroline Moderator

    So glad you are here Rob ... you are such a bright light - Thanks for all you give...... and what you share.

    Get those Dogs outa your bed for crying out loud!
  4. Joe Gavin

    Joe Gavin Face Everything And Rise

    Cool to read Rob! I quit the coffee a couple of weeks ago based on a post by Jason L on the FB page and so far pretty painless. Work in EMF hell and well, in NJ too. Hear you on the extrication plans. Thanks for sharing!

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