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Discussion in 'Beginners Area' started by MITpowered26, Oct 10, 2019.

  1. MITpowered26

    MITpowered26 New Member

    Why does spoon feeding not work? Why are you not receiving answer you desperately need?

    The answer lies in the fact that there is no short cut. And that approach is a short cut. The problem with spoon feeding, is that not only do you set yourself back further from needing what you don't realize what you really need, but it teaches you to "game the system" ... for worse.. always...

    the truth reveals itself in time..
    caroline likes this.
  2. And...
    why crawl when you can run?
  3. MITpowered26

    MITpowered26 New Member

    The difference is running, versus piggy backing on someone else that is doing the running.
    caroline likes this.
  4. MITpowered26

    MITpowered26 New Member

    Leading someone to the water is a big task... but the bigger task is drinking it.. that is what you CANNOT shortcut.
  5. Katie Durham

    Katie Durham New Member

    There is a disconnect in using the term spoonfeeding with this thinking.

    A friend coined the term – the law of conservation of ambiguity – that no matter how much you dig on a particular item or items you never get to the point of understanding the whole, just more and more about pieces of it. Perhaps more and more pieces. (Except of course for Doc who can always tie everything together, LOL.)

    There is truth in proselytizing not working, especially on health matters. That spoonfeeding tends to crash and burn big time.

    But if someone is doing his own digging, when is it no longer spoon feeding but something else? Spoon feeding has to include watching lectures and podcasts and reading generalized articles where the author has made the cut about what you hear or read. Jack has told us repeatedly that the hippo doesn’t need to understand why it is following a circadian rhythm, and that while we may be more likely to adopt that lifestyle if we intricately understand why, it won’t improve our health over just doing it.

    So all the dozens and dozens of jack podcasts I have watched are just spoon feeding according to this thread, but not diving into the books that he recommends? I understand the concepts better as a result of the books, but I can’t say I truly understand it.
  6. MITpowered26

    MITpowered26 New Member

    Sorry, my meaning is lost.

    My meaning is a lot more infantile with how I relate to it..

    For me, its crudely, and maybe literally, sitting there helplessly and expecting things to happen.

    I consider digging, watching podcasts, lectures, as acts of learning, or maybe learning to learn.... so I don't consider this spoon feeding.

    Every shitty creative idea leads you eventually to a good artistic idea. There is value in all of it, as long as you keep going.

    Maybe the heart of this thread that I'm trying to convey is this:

    see the error in your ways, and improve upon it. tweak it. change it. keep going...fuck, even keep repeating the same mistake over and over and over again until you satisfy holding on to the insanity of your irrational comfort.. and then change.
    caroline and Katie Durham like this.
  7. drezy

    drezy New Member

    The question/concept and post seem rhetorical on the surface of it.

    We spoon feed those that are significantly undeveloped (aka babies) or handicapped.

    You mean spoon feeding information I assume. Is that correct?
  8. MITpowered26

    MITpowered26 New Member

    Hmmm.. illl get back to you dre
  9. caroline

    caroline Moderator

    I sort of think you mean ....just taking baby steps every day, in some way moving forward, pushing ourselves in spite of our laziness to do nothing and let others do it for us.

    Jack’s message is really pretty simple .....the three legged stool. That is all you really have to take on board.

    But ...we have to get out of bed every morning and implement it ....no matter how we feel, no matter that we would sooner stay in bed and pull the covers over our head!

    the message is simple ....the implementation takes our commitment.

    once we commit to seeing the sunrise everyday..... joy is sure to follow...and overflow into the rest of our day, the rest of our life.
    MITpowered26 and Phosphene like this.
  10. MITpowered26

    MITpowered26 New Member

    Thankyou @caroline

    You say it better.

    I didn't have ill-intent with this post, just to be clear. I just come from a history where family did everything for me: how to eat, how to think, how to (not) feel.. I only independently learned to wipe my own ass (but comically we have also had conversations about how to do that properly too, haha.. embarassing)

    caroline likes this.
  11. caroline

    caroline Moderator

    Jason.....is that the way children are raised in a Chinese family?
    I am interested to learn your history. I have travelled in China and I have always been so impressed with the way Chinese young people treat their elders. They seem to have such respect for the older generation.
  12. MITpowered26

    MITpowered26 New Member

    Hm.... thought provoking question @caroline

    Let me reflect on what I think I know.

    I think the general principles and themes are consistent. Respect, family first above individual needs. Listen to your elders.

    I "may" be an extreme case.. a hyperbole in Chinese (Canadian) culture due to the fact that I have probably have had a below-average maturation rate ...a laggard, as my uncle would like to say...and have needed, and leaned on my parents, and have allowed them to have influence over my life "maybe" longer than most. Maybe not.

    The struggle is real for the asian male, and even more confusing for an asian north american male - with mixed messages from non asian cultures in Canada, with respect to individual versus family needs.

    The asian son is highly valued, more than the daughter. I'm not fully sure why, but perhaps the son is expected to be the breadwinner and provide for the parents when they become old.

    My sister has worked very very hard to flip this script. She is also a nurse too. And she has succeeded. I don't think my parents expect anymore, or hope, anymore to depend on me when they are older.. maybe monetarily now with the inception of my business.. But other needs, no. Kudos to my sister?

    The asian son is greatly enabled in Chinese culture, whether in China or North America. I've thought about culturally, why its so hard for me to date as someone of adult age. Here is part of the reason, and I mean no offense, this is just what I come to believe as true. There is a racial hierarchy. There have been social experiments on this as well. On tinder for example, as a male, the asian male is LEAST likely to be swiped right on by females... we are, culturally, lowest on the totem pole.. by asian females, white females, any females. The female equivalent? Black females. Again, I mean no offense, this just part of the truth.

    The asian male comes to convey values of "mamas boy," "spoon fed," "NOT independent," "Wife must take care of son's parents".. lots of baggage. And I don't deny some of this is true for some of the asian male populus.

    But you know what? This isn't victim mentality. This is just a barrier we contend with. The real helpful truth behind this? We are creators of our own destiny, asian son or not. I see many asian males successfully dating when I walk through the grocery stores, interracial or not, and that makes me smile. Because those dudes beat the odds, and they rose above the circumstances, and put in the work to make themselves more valuable then their label..they didn't let it define them. And that's the heart of it. Everyone has barriers. And to destroy those barriers, it starts with .. quite fundamentally.. thinking better. You can think your way to overcoming everything.. thinking.. then perceiving better, then acting better. BEING better. Valuing yourself.

    As additional foray, my korean female friend, interestingly wanted to match me with one of her single friends from Korea. She said "I wont marry any Asian male in korea.. because they are TOO ATTACHED to their mother.. and that's a problem..when your husband chooses his mother over his wife.." Real. There was a thought north american asian males are way more ideal. Because we are still "asian" but we are not attached to our mothers because we are "north american".... as soon as I told her I live at home still, she shook her head, and she said she cannot introduce me to her korean girlfriend any more.

    Maybe too much info @caroline !! Hope this helps.. not sure! This helped me writing it!

    caroline and Jenelle like this.
  13. caroline

    caroline Moderator

    Thanks for that Jason ....need to ponder. I do love that you put yourself out there like that.
    MITpowered26 likes this.

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