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No, Really, I'm in a tub of icewater and documenting on the interwebs. . by cavemam.

Discussion in 'My Optimal Journal' started by jeanie@truelongmont.com, Apr 29, 2012.

  1. ealachan

    ealachan New Member


    50lbs?! Aren't you my height? That would put you at less than 150lbs, wouldn't it?
     

  2. ****please note, all references to Inger in the following post are not about the wonderful girl Inger. They are about the idealized notion of Inger that we each have based on our worldview. My idealized Inger is a woodland nymph running around naked in the woods eating shrooms and berries and catching fish in her mouth after stunning them with her mermaid fin. I'm sorry if I make the real Inger uncomfortable, but it's really Jack's doing as he has used Inger as a public example more than once. :D *****



    We are not in disagreement at all. I am countering because I think the words say N-1, but the actions (and now and then posts on this forum) say something different. And so many people hang on your every word as gospels from a deity - I like to help people understand not just follow.



    Since my POV and experience is different than the MAJORITY - I feel it's important to explore warts and all, even if I end up wrong. Perhaps it's even more important and meaningful to those who run into very very large hills when trying to be Jack or Inger. Those that see success have success as their guide and inspiration - the rest of us need some company in our misery every now and then.



    For some, one way to move onward and upward is to step down a few other roads to find our path to the destination. Yet the forum can lean towards projecting the idea that there is one big well lit path and if you are not improving from it - you are not doing it hard enough. To me that's identical to spending MORE time on the treadmill because the 2 hrs a day you were not doing wasn't working.



    I like the idea of everyone having flashlights and shining them all over the place, rather than following one well lit path. Admittedly I'm an instigator like that.



    I do realize that my personal example and path is so far removed from the others, due to mechanical issues - my N-1 is damn irrelevant to anybody here. However, my point in sharing is to illustrate and testify that sometimes N-1 success isn't to sit and feel forever broken because you don't have the holy spirit when you have a raw fish head, but instead to encourage to keep look for your blissful raw fish head or realize you are not going to have bliss, and dealing with that and moving on. I still don't understand what is harmful in acknowledging when something sucks. I didn't say wallow, simply acknowledge.



    I hope my thinking of counter examples, and alternate theory helps someone who is getting nowhere doing exactly what they think they should be yet facing failure. I didn't learn the value in failure until very late in life, so I want to serve by helping others fail a lot.



    I do mean to counter balance "just do it!" enthusiasm. That reminds me so much of the lifelong athlete encouraging me to finish that 10th kilometer. It reminds me of it, because it's the same. People can be so happy and enthusiastic and want to help, particularly when they have an answer, it's easy to forget it's not very motivating to others when it's not their answer and the subjects experience is dismissed. It's also easy to deliver the message with the implied meaning of you are in error and your experience is irrelevant.



    I know there are many more than not who are uplifted by the messages and the way they are presented by the great examples we have here - but to project that is the ONLY way is the opposite of N-1, and gives a cognitive dissonance. The specifics of any one persons N-1 are simply too complex to fit into a singular RX made my someone else.



    Since you have a journal section, and it implies that one can testify to their own thoughts, feelings and N-1, I feel the need to offer another view when I see a drift on this site, in the platitude direction. JUST EAT MORE FISH! JUST TAKE COLDER BATHS! JUST DO SOMETHING HARDER AND MORE! Implying just ignore all evidence to the contrary and all of your N-1 signs. Thus this too long manifesto (thanks for reading this far if you did!).







    I found out long ago, at dentist appointment gone bad, that you simply must own it when you are different. (red head mutation effects certain anesthetics).





    So although I think when you boil it down, I'm repeating exactly what you are. N-1 for the win.
     

  3. 207.6 this a.m., 5'7".



    I should say I want to move my BF% from 40 to 25%.
     

  4. MY WORK HERE IS DONE!!! hehehe.



    I have to agree, there is a reason people have to be trained and indoctrinated into "protection" when they know damn good and well how babies are made.
     
  5. ealachan

    ealachan New Member




    Oh, ok...I've got a good 4 inches on you. I thought you were taller, and I was going to put up all kinds of ruckus about weight not mattering as much as BF% etc, blah blah. Don't mind me. The inner girly-girl is getting thirsty as it nears to 5pm...;)
     
  6. Shijin13

    Shijin13 Guest

    Cavemam;64520 wrote: ****please note, all references to Inger in the following post are not about the wonderful girl Inger. They are about the idealized notion of Inger that we each have based on our worldview. My idealized Inger is a woodland nymph running around naked in the woods eating shrooms and berries and catching fish in her mouth after stunning them with her mermaid fin. I'm sorry if I make the real Inger uncomfortable, but it's really Jack's doing as he has used Inger as a public example more than once. :D *****



    We are not in disagreement at all. I am countering because I think the words say N-1, but the actions (and now and then posts on this forum) say something different. And so many people hang on your every word as gospels from a deity - I like to help people understand not just follow.



    Since my POV and experience is different than the MAJORITY - I feel it's important to explore warts and all, even if I end up wrong. Perhaps it's even more important and meaningful to those who run into very very large hills when trying to be Jack or Inger. Those that see success have success as their guide and inspiration - the rest of us need some company in our misery every now and then.



    For some, one way to move onward and upward is to step down a few other roads to find our path to the destination. Yet the forum can lean towards projecting the idea that there is one big well lit path and if you are not improving from it - you are not doing it hard enough. To me that's identical to spending MORE time on the treadmill because the 2 hrs a day you were not doing wasn't working.



    I like the idea of everyone having flashlights and shining them all over the place, rather than following one well lit path. Admittedly I'm an instigator like that.



    I do realize that my personal example and path is so far removed from the others, due to mechanical issues - my N-1 is damn irrelevant to anybody here. However, my point in sharing is to illustrate and testify that sometimes N-1 success isn't to sit and feel forever broken because you don't have the holy spirit when you have a raw fish head, but instead to encourage to keep look for your blissful raw fish head or realize you are not going to have bliss, and dealing with that and moving on. I still don't understand what is harmful in acknowledging when something sucks. I didn't say wallow, simply acknowledge.



    I hope my thinking of counter examples, and alternate theory helps someone who is getting nowhere doing exactly what they think they should be yet facing failure. I didn't learn the value in failure until very late in life, so I want to serve by helping others fail a lot.



    I do mean to counter balance "just do it!" enthusiasm. That reminds me so much of the lifelong athlete encouraging me to finish that 10th kilometer. It reminds me of it, because it's the same. People can be so happy and enthusiastic and want to help, particularly when they have an answer, it's easy to forget it's not very motivating to others when it's not their answer and the subjects experience is dismissed. It's also easy to deliver the message with the implied meaning of you are in error and your experience is irrelevant.



    I know there are many more than not who are uplifted by the messages and the way they are presented by the great examples we have here - but to project that is the ONLY way is the opposite of N-1, and gives a cognitive dissonance. The specifics of any one persons N-1 are simply too complex to fit into a singular RX made my someone else.



    Since you have a journal section, and it implies that one can testify to their own thoughts, feelings and N-1, I feel the need to offer another view when I see a drift on this site, in the platitude direction. JUST EAT MORE FISH! JUST TAKE COLDER BATHS! JUST DO SOMETHING HARDER AND MORE! Implying just ignore all evidence to the contrary and all of your N-1 signs. Thus this too long manifesto (thanks for reading this far if you did!).







    I found out long ago, at dentist appointment gone bad, that you simply must own it when you are different. (red head mutation effects certain anesthetics).





    So although I think when you boil it down, I'm repeating exactly what you are. N-1 for the win.


    Cavemam this is by far one of the most amazing things I've read. Wow! I think you just wrote Jacks blog on paying attn to yourself and what your body's doing b/c it is the only thing that matters. Everyone's n=1 is important but the only one of value to you is yours! Awesome just freaking awesome
     

  7. Thanks for sharing! I love hearing your story. However, I would like to plant a little seed for those who are super obese.



    What if, it's not really about vanity, and vanity and superior self control had little to do with why you didn't become super-obese. This is a mindset that so hard for people to wrap their thoughts around. Frankly, until I really got it - I was stuck in a self-hate kind of space because I thought I wasn't vain enough to stop the fat train. Now although I don't look it, I realize I'm pathologically vain and that has no bearing on my weight.



    Binge disordered eating is simply not the same as the overeating that comes with ones body putting on fat way into the super-obese category.



    One personality marker of someone with binging as well as anorexia type disordered eating is that the concept that you are having a binge episode because of loss of will power or loss of discipline, thus the moments between binges are due to you being awesome and having discipline and control when you are not binging. Notice all the "high strung" bingers and adrenal fatigue and other co-problems that come with those control issues. Hunger signals are tied to all kinds of DIFFERENT things than with someone who is super obese.



    For someone who is super obese, their body is simply in "MUST STORE FAT" mode. The reasons for this are not well understood and seem to be QUITE variable. They eat because their brains are putting all energy towards storing fat to stay alive. Someone who is super-obese, their body and brain will die if they don't store the fat. The body and brain that needs to store fat or die will eat anything and everything it can. There are not "triggers", there are not certain foods that cause a downward spiral. . they are being directed to keep eating period to fuel the need to stay alive.
     
  8. Inger

    Inger Silver


    LOL... I just laughed my ass off..

    I do not know if the wine helped any (I just emptied one bottle of organic Argentinian Malbec just by my own tonight..:rolleyes: and 250 grams raw organic Macadamia nuts.. OMG) but this was just too funny.. ;)

    Look Cavemam. I am built like this. I do not care one bit what you do to acieve success, the only thing that matters to me is, you do...! I so enjoy that people are happy and not suffering, I do not care one bit how they come to their Nirvana...lol

    OMG I think I had too much wine by now. :rolleyes:

    My body fat is 24% BTW. According to my BF scale. Quite a lot..lol. But I feel just great so I do not care one bit.

    IDK.. I opened this bottle of Malbec because everything was getting too much. I do not know what to do with my ex moving in here.. I am toally lost. But hey, I am not yet in despair. I know the answer will come to me soon. I just need to be patient and I will know what to do.

    Huh. Patience. Listen. Not my strength so far.
     

  9. If you make a little ealachan, imagine that girly-girl saying "Now fetch mama a martini!"
     
  10. Jack Kruse

    Jack Kruse Administrator

    Im headed to the wine cellar.........
     
  11. DarleenMB

    DarleenMB Silver


    and your point? I'm 5' 9.5" and I'm aiming for 130 some day. 140 is ok but 130 is better.
     
  12. RiverNeighbor

    RiverNeighbor New Member

    I like the idea of everyone having flashlights and shining them all over the place, rather than following one well lit path. Admittedly I'm an instigator like that.




    Loved the whole thing but really loved this.
     
  13. ealachan

    ealachan New Member


    no mini-me, no how, no way, not ever. Not even for a martini-fetcher. I am not mama material.
     
  14. ealachan

    ealachan New Member


    to each their own. 130lbs at 5'9" would look utterly emaciated on me, but I also have a large frame under all the junk in my trunk.
     

  15. Seed officially planted.
     
  16. Endless

    Endless Guest

    Wonderful post, thanks for the pondering material!
     

  17. Dye your hair red and spend the holidays in italy. Their hormone panels rock and they love red-heads. Then look at your ex with new "red head coming home from italy eyes". Worked for me. :cool:
     
  18. caroline

    caroline Moderator

    I love your post. For me personally - you and Inger and Dr. K and a lot of others on this forum are the inspiration to look for my own n-1. I think if we have been here long enough we realize we are all so different and our path is going to be slightly different but I get so inspired to work harder at what is right for me. I find little nuggets here and there and now I finally have found what seems to be right for me [my own intuition finally showed up!] - but it is only because of all of you. There are so many amazing people on this forum who contribute in so many different ways. Thanks to everyone. A bottle of wine sounds like such a good idea!
     
  19. caroline

    caroline Moderator


    I am sending you a big hug! you will work thru this somehow You are a very strong young woman! Maybe you need a little vacation in Australia and some time playing in the ocean.
     
  20. Shijin13

    Shijin13 Guest

    Anna. Your not seeing or hearing what I'm saying I gave you an example of socialized care that's been in place for over 40yrs yet you ignore it. You got you opinions & it's not going to change



    Good luck. I wish we'll with health
     

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