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My journey/journal

Discussion in 'My Optimal Journal' started by Christine_L, Aug 8, 2018.

  1. This is great advice. It's also a kick in the ass! I studied finance like a good studious girl and know what to do except just haven't. I have accounts set up to transfer funds into and havent don that yet. Story of my life. I like this feedback. I'm going to make the move this week.

    I live a pretty simple life. I don't overspend on devices, cars (though I do want a cool hot rod!) or gaming lol (I think I have a TV that I don't use) except on food - oyster dinners, grass fed beef, seafood, etc... yum...
    JanSz, drezy and caroline like this.
  2. Very true conservative approach!
  3. LOVE this story - incredibly inspirational! I think the paradigm of working 24/7 is over now. I'd like to imagine I will be in the same place as the family you met sometime in the future. If we want to be healthy and happy we cant expect to get that way doing unhealthy and stressful things.
    caroline likes this.
  4. Really true.
  5. Update 6/23/19

    You guys. Tomorrow is my birthday!

    I love celebrating my birthday. Usually about 2 months out I dread getting older and then a week or 2 before the big day its a full on constant celebration in my mind. My boyfriend teases me and says almost everyday is my birthday because I keep asking for treats and gifts from him because "its my birthday" LOL... :D:D:D He pretends to be me "Cutie its almost my birthday... in 6 months!" :rolleyes::rolleyes: He's very endearing and probably right. He gets my weirdness and likes it. He must be crazy! I love the attention from him because I did not get any positive attention when I was younger. I was too big, too tall, too pale, too quiet, too many pimples, too many curls in my hair ... How much things can change in such a short period of time. This coming from a teenager who was made fun of and wanted to speak up but could not. I felt choked, stifled, and unable to fit in. So I stopped fitting in. Now I have no qualms talking or telling people what I think. Once in awhile I will give myself pause and think if I am being annoying or rude. Probably true but I modulate the tone depending on the person. I've gotten better at it. It's truly a craft. They call it emotional intelligence or some shit. Finally. The 6 year old me is back. She has emerged!

    Saturday had a "pool" day at the state park I wanted to try for some time and spent hours in the sun with my mom and sis. I'm tan but not tan enough... yet. BF took me out to surf and turf and today we took the beagle for a walk in the woods and made dinner early. He bought me pearl earrings that look absolutely lovely (my birth stone and from oysters! Love that.), white roses, and 100% dark chocolate. Of course I didn't even eat the chocolate he got me last time but I love that he knew to try the one without sugar. He's so cute. It was a relaxing weekend. Tomorrow might get a massage and a pedicure after sitting in the sun all morning. Fam is taking me to happy hour for oysters. Yum.

    Besides the glowing 2 paragraphs, I think about the quiet whispers that still haven't been able to shake.

    The wounds from my Dad being gone and his physical pains reverberating throughout my neck and head giving me anxiety and stress that somehow I will suffer the same fate as him. Every tinge and soreness is a stroke. But I do not live his lifestyle and I do not have his labwork. Use logic Christine.

    The life I have versus the life I want.

    Then I hear my sister...
    "Christine do I have to keep the video of you dancing with that guy in Nashville? Because its weird... " :whistle::rofl::rofl:
    "If she doesn't want to be by herself she has to go to the concert with the guy from KISS" :rofl::rofl:

    LOL Cant top that. Goodnight ya'll
    Last edited: Jun 23, 2019
    Alex97232, MITpowered26 and JanSz like this.
  6. caroline

    caroline Moderator

    It sounds wonderful [sort of] to have endless birth.... days! Isn't that what we are doing here .....we are being reborn, and re energised and entangled and re focused.

    We now find love and stimulation and kindness in endless and simple places, everyplace is our oyster because we know how to look for the simple truths of our existence.

    YAY US ....for being smart enuf to be here and to live the three legged stool ......at least give it our best shot every single day!

    Have the happiest of birthdays every single day Christine...xoxoxo

    PS .....I am a little jealous ...you are so young and lovely. It is a real pleasure to read your journal with all your wonderful insights. You are a smart cookie.
    Christine_L likes this.
  7. caroline

    caroline Moderator

    I have to write more .....

    I, too, as a teenager and younger ....was too big, too fat, too quiet, too many pimples and always made fun of and never fit in. Worst of all - no attention and love at home.

    But ....here we are! We are just fine! I will speak for myself .....I am really fine!!!
    Alex97232 and Christine_L like this.
  8. JanSz

    JanSz Gold

    Life changes us.
    Whatever, put your mind at no divorces setting, only death do us part.

    caroline, Alex97232 and Christine_L like this.
  9. Isn't it so great! Rising like a Phoenix from the ashes in the sun! Living our best life! Today is a new day everyday. I love your positivity @caroline. You are so encouraging and kind. I can't wait to meet you one day and give you a huge hug!!
    caroline and Alex97232 like this.
  10. Life does change us. I love your mindset. Love is one of those things you must hold onto with all your heart and mind. You're a real romantic @JanSz and an excellent example.

    I wanted to ask you, have you gone to the Swing NJ events in whippany? I know you like dancing, perhaps you can bring your girlfriend. I've gone many times its alot of fun. We could double date and make @drezy jealous!
    caroline likes this.
  11. Alex97232

    Alex97232 Gold

    Christine_L likes this.
  12. JanSz

    JanSz Gold

    I have not been dancing for quite awhile.
    My new girlfriend is not (really) dancing.
    Eventually I will bring her into it, I hope.
    Swing NJ events in Whippany sounds like East Coast Swing, ECS.
    My last dancing was West Coast Swing, WCS at Rhythm In Shoes in Boonton NJ.
    Philip Lamothe
    Christine_L and caroline like this.
  13. caroline

    caroline Moderator

    This journal is so uplifting - for so many reasons! It just oozes LIFE....
    MITpowered26, Christine_L and JanSz like this.
  14. They do a whole bunch of different styles. It depends on the teacher. Joe Palmer does Balboa, he is a really good teacher. The dance lesson is about 1 hour, then they start the "party" and have lots of fresh fruit for snacks. If anything your GF can come for the music!

  15. :love:

  16. Loving you
    Isn't the right thing to do
    How can I ever change things
    That I feel?

    If I could
    Maybe I'd give you my world
    How can I
    When you won't take it from me
    caroline likes this.
  17. 5G Canary

    5G Canary Gold

    You are that “pearl” in the oyster... Sounds like your Birthday was as special as you!
    Happy 33rd Birthday... Love it!
    MITpowered26, drezy and Christine_L like this.
  18. Thank you so much! I think I will have oysters tonight! :rofl::D:rofl:
    drezy likes this.
  19. 5G Canary

    5G Canary Gold

    That makes two of us...yum! ;)
    drezy likes this.
  20. Cheers to THAT!! :D
    drezy likes this.

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