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My dad has malignant pancreatic cancer, I´d appreciate suggestions to safe his life if not too late

Discussion in 'Mitochondrial Rx' started by Pablo, Jun 30, 2022.

  1. Penny

    Penny New Member

    You have to show them *studies*... like this one:

    This one tells you that the berberines - like Oregon Grape Root will target c-myc - how much it is expressed will determine the amount of metastasis...


    Then, when you look at this one - you can see if one targets c-myc, it is helpful for pancreatic cancer...

    The doctor will then look at you and tell you they he can't prescribe it... but he will have the study and can't say squat about you taking it yourself...

    They have their protocols that they follow and they get the results they get with them, and they are hesitant to add anything because they fear it will screw up their protocols... which actually sometimes work really well...

    Berberines are also featured in the book: Herbal Antibiotics from Steven Harrod Buhner - he likes reshi, boneset (cytotoxic also), rhodiola, ginseng, ashwaghanda and a few others to beef up your immune system... think of it as an alternate immune system:)

    As your dad now has no immune system, he is now in unique territory - the cancers are exploding because the jab screws up your immune system -

    For a really fabulous interview on a guy who has studied methylene blue and the mitochondria, check this out:


    I find doctors have to play "whack a mole" with tumors because if they don't, the tumor grows too fast/metastisizes for any of these other therapies to work - they just don't work fast enough for some cancers... just my opinion:)

    I would be now dead if it wasn't for my doctor:)
  2. Pablo

    Pablo New Member

    First thank you all a lot for your suggestions and comments. Don´t have time to investigate individually all those now but I will, thanks

    I was with dad in hospital a few hours ago. Good news is there is only one tumor, they haven´t seen metastasis today in the scaner, so today we kind of got some hope . It is malignant tumor of 5x5x3 cm, so very big I think, I don´t know how big tumors usually are. But at least he is not rid with metastasis stuff, supposedly is only one big tumor.

    I didn´t talk with doctors, just with dad for just maybe half hour. He feels like he has been recently, quite good, just some digestion issues, doesn´t have much apetite, but no pain. We chat a little casual, asked me about my exam this thursday, in the end we cried and got emotional a few seconds. He doesn´t like to get too emotional and neither do I, but I enjoyed the encounter, I think it´s normal to cry a little.

    Doctors still need to talk together and decide if surgery and/or other treatments are an option, so we don´t know almost anything. Just that they saw no metastasis.

    Regarding alternative treatments, I really appreciate your suggestions here. However I am at the moment just focusing on the DDW with my mom and brother for 2 reasons:

    1-Couple days ago they were crazy opposed to even look at any "alternative hippie stuff", so I don´t want to tell them 20 different things cause their brains will explode and I won´t get anything. i´m focusing on DDW cause I think it is one of the few things Jack focuses in this situations, I haven´t seen him talking or focusing about the other compounds you mentioned. I could be wrong. I will look at them however, when I got time, just trying to prioritize.

    Yesterday I got a talk with my brother and gave him the book of Somylai about the DDW, asked him, almost begged, to look at it. He was kindda open, surprisingly, though I don´t expect him investigating too much. My strategy is just to advance/suggest my DDW idea only when I clearly see windows of opportunity, when my words can be really listened for a few seconds.

    In that manner, the DDW came out in conversation today with my mom, ultra skeptic but asked me its name in spanish to google it. I see a little window of opportunity, if dad can get good surgery and/or his cancer doesn´t advance too quickly and I can get him to drink the DDW, but for that I need to maneuver between so many skeptics: my mom, my bro, dad, and probably I should talk with the docs and get them to at least take a serious look on DDW and admit it is not horseshit, and it can complement whatever conventional treatment.

    2-Also til thursday I´ll be damm busy with an exam, if I pass it I get public "secure" job with decent money to sustain my health stuff and my bitcoin and whatnot. So this week I have some preasure with all these stuff together!! I will examine for sure the berberine, and all that other stuff, and more, this weekend for sure, so I thank you.

    So, just hope my dad can get good surgery, he still has some time left and I can convince people with the DDW intitially, and then with all of Jack´s protocols and investigate whatever else is there. Not easy all that but we´ll see.

    Also at some point, I think some consult with Jack may be great idea, though I don´t know exactly when to do it. Right now I´m broke, but my parents do have money, so it should be when I convince them it is worth it to put the money on this, at least to get a second doctor opinion. But, we still don´t even have most of the info on the treatment options and prognosis, so I guess just wait a few days while I get my family educated on DDW.

    If I get them on board with the DDW I´m still not sure about the dosing. i guess it´d depend a lot on the severity of the cancer, so need to wait and maybe ask Jack if we schedule a consult. Gabor talks in his book about higher ppm than I was thinking. I was thinking in giving like 2 litres of undiluted 18 or 25 ppm, kind of more hardcore, but Gabor goes higher ppm and then goes lowering periodically and adding some time without.

    I rememeber Lazlo Boros somewhere saying he recommended also doing that, because if you begin super low then you could not go lower then, implying that the cancer could somehow acclimate and get used to the low D level.

    I don´t know. Tomorrow I´ll know more.
    John Schumacher and JanSz like this.
  3. Anne V

    Anne V Silver

    Sorry about your dad. In hospital you cannot do anything . I know , i was in for 6 weeks end of 2019.Somebody really good for cancer is Zsofia Clemens , in Romania.
    https://www.paleomedicina.com › en › dr-zsofia-clemens.
    otherwise , you are only responsible for yourself , so it is a question of letting go. as hard as it seems. With appreciation, light and love xx
    Josie Thomson, caroline and JanSz like this.
  4. JanSz

    JanSz Gold

    For 30 Euros you (hopefully) may get detailed diet description.

    Anne V likes this.
  5. Pablo

    Pablo New Member

    Dad got out of hospital Friday and we went to the village house. He lost quite a lot of weight. Doesn´t look too horrible but not very good either. He walks slowly cause he had some sciatica issue last days he was in hospital. He really doesn´t want to talk much about his illness, also I asked him to do some lifestyle stuff and said he would not change the things he does, he just wanted to be peaceful and he´d just quit all alcohol that´s it.

    Then yerterday he confirmed me that the tumor is not suitable for surgery. Doctors are going to see if they can put him on chemotherapy. This looks pretty bad, the only "good" thing is that there is not metastasis, or at least they haven´t seen it so far. We didn´t talk about how much time he has left.

    Weirdly enough I told him about the DDW, that I had already ordered it, and he was willing to take it, and have a look at Gabor´s book. Thing is, he is eating a lot of fruit and drinking orange juice, deuterium boms, even though I told him about carbs been "no bueno" for cancer patients, several times, it´s like his brain doesn´t put 2 and 2 together. Cause I don´t buy he doesn´t care.

    So, the only good points I see here are:
    -He is open for DDW
    '-He is open to get a consult with Jack
    -Doctors didn´t see metastasis

    Bad points... well obviously too many, but we could highlight:
    -The tumor is not suitable for surgery, cause it is touching some vein "esplénica", in Spanish, and there are some vascular issues there that don´t make possible surgery
    -My dad doen´t think well here, doens´t use the blueblocker nor does any of Jack stuf I´ve been pounding him for years and eats too many fruits and now he began with the freaking orange juice

    Anyways, I know it looks very bad but I always like to fight anything in my life till the very end, so


    My best bet is hoping the DDW can buy my dad some time in order for me to convince him/his bad brain to do full keto and black swan living, all in, like I do. And also to get some ideas from Jack, and even just my dad listening from a doc, and paying for it, for the very same thing I´m trying him to do, maybe he is more receptive to do "our weird stuff"...

    I bought 18 ppm DDW, but still havent got it, it arrives between 15th and 27th of this month, hopefully ASAP. My main doubt here is the dosing, it looks tricky. Gabor in his book talks in worst case cancer scenarios to begin 85 ppm and then lower about 20 ppm less every 1 or 2 months, til reaching the lowest ppm posible (he talks about 25 ppm, but now there is 18 ppm available), but I was thinking giving him the bottles of 18 ppm directly, without mixing it, taking into account he´ll probably eat some fruits and do bad lifestyle choices at least for a while...

    So, my next steps are:
    '1-Hearing what the oncologist tells my dad tomorrow (I cannot go with him cause I got obligations, but my mom will go, and they hopefully will tell me exactly how bad the situation is, how much time he may have, posibilities of chemotherapy, etc)
    2- Finish Gabor´s book
    3-Get a consult with Jack, my dad and I, if Jack is available and my parents pay, I think they will but I need to know how much it costs(he is an English teacher so no problem the language)
    4-Get dad drinking DDW as soon as it arrives, with the quantity and schedule Jack suggests
    5 Get my parents to order a shit ton of DDW 18 and 25 ppm
    6-Hope he gets momentarily better with DDW and I can get him into sunrise, keto epi paleo and blueblockers first, and then full black swan life
    7-If some of this magic plan of mine fails, quite likely btw, been able to accept it without (too much) anger. Try my best and then letting go of the outcome, trying not to be too harsh on my own mistakes or my dad´s , mom and brother. That´s gonna be tough...
    Last edited: Jul 11, 2022
    caroline, EWO and JanSz like this.
  6. Pablo

    Pablo New Member

    Tomorrow dad begins with chemo once a week and in 3 months they will check again his tumor to see if they can operate and remover it, so they ser some chance, my min said the doctor said he estimated about a 30% posibilities for It yo become removable by then.

    I have a sense the DDW could substantially improve those possibilities, since It has been shown good resulta. The DDW is coming todas, earlier than expected.

    I will speak with him about getting a consult with Jack and/or Gabor/Lazlo or some if these DDW guys. But I ser things slightly more positively today...
    Last edited: Jul 12, 2022
    EWO likes this.
  7. IR has the potential to reduce the dosage of paclitaxel in clinical anticancer chemotherapy to avoid paclitaxel-induced severe side-effects, such as lower white blood cell counts, hair loss, diarrhea, mouth sores, and hypersensitivity reactions.


    Antitumor action (IR can inhibit cancer cell proliferation and potentiate the therapeutic effectiveness of chemotherapy)

    Multifunctional near-infrared light-triggered biodegradable micelles for chemo- and photo-thermal combination therapy
    A combination of chemo- and photo-thermal therapy (PTT) has provided a promising efficient approach for cancer therapy.


    Synthetic scheme and structures of targeted NIR light sensitive nanoplatform c(RGDyK)-SNSC and αvβ3-mediated binding of tumor cells


    A) Size distribution of c(RGDyK)-SNSC-cypate-PTX micelles; (B) Transmission electron microscope pictures of c(RGDyK)-SNSC-cypate-PTX; TEM images of c(RGDyK)-SNSC-cypate-PTX after NIR illumination (765 nm, 400 mW/cm2) for 10 min (C) and 1 h (D). (E) Absorption spectra of PTX, c(RGDyK)-SNSC-PTX, cypate and c(RGDyK)-SNSC-cypate-PTX; (F) Photoluminescence spectra of cypate and c(RGDyK)-SNSC -cypate-PTX;​

    @Pablo - I could go on an on... but let's get to the bottom line - which device and how much time.

    Please consider: purchasing either the
    The problem with the smaller one is it will not provide enough intensity of light in a short enough period of time.

    The problem with infrared light therapy is the thermal dynamic effect - too much heat before the light therapy has a change to make an effect.

    So if you choose the less expensive model, realize you must use fans to "help" reduce the heat effect.

    Also put him on "ice". Cold Therapy is his friend. While doing the infrared therapy, put his hands and feet (his glabrous skin) in ice water.

    Please consider doing this therapy a minimum of 20 minutes four times per day, placing the infrared device (Firestorm) within foot to 6 inches from the location of his pancreas. Make sure he moves slightly, not allowing the light to over work and burn the skin. This movement can be as small as three inches back and forth. The Firestorm & Firehawk use coherent light, focused beams through their COB or domed apparatuses. This gives EMR-Tek the advantage, providing light coherency and deeper tissue penetration.

    May I also recommend: Photobiomodulation Supplementation: Krill oil & Astaxanthin​

    Last edited: Jul 12, 2022
    JanSz likes this.
  8. JanSz

    JanSz Gold

    Firestorm & Firehawk
    They are (relatively speaking) low power red lights.
    @Jack Kruse is using this type of red light but of much higher power.

    How IR-a actually works?
    It eventually produces (huge amounts) of melatonin within mitochondria.
    That melatonin produces Matrix water
    That water is involved in production of ATP (about bodyweight per day).
    When water is synthesized it produces huge amounts of energy.
    With that energy you can light a medium size town with 1350 large lights (each light 1000 watts)
    Think of blood going to the heart always having newly synthesized water in it. (7000 liters when resting)


    How about
    supplemental melatonin (instead of red light)
    or in addition to red lights.
    Last time I read, there are no possibility to kill person with too large dose of melatonin.
    Aging is Not a Disease, Damn It! | Page 29 | Jack Kruse Optimal Health Forum
    #564 (jackkruse.com)

    #565 (jackkruse.com)
    time 1:01:30
    1500mg melatonin is not toxic
    there is no negative feedback loop (like in estrogen or testosterone)
    no worry about shutting down your own production

    time 1:06:20
    200mg day and night

    Time 1:06:40
    He, Dr. John Lieurance, had a Covid, was dosing 800mg day and night

    Time 1:08:00
    contraindications, --- only depression is a potential contraindication to using melatonin
    if you are already depressed and already a little groggy, work with the health care provider

    Last edited: Jul 12, 2022
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  9. JanSz

    JanSz Gold

  10. JanSz

    JanSz Gold

  11. JanSz

    JanSz Gold

  12. Pablo

    Pablo New Member

    Thanks for the suggestions. If it were me I´d obviously go crazy with CT,infrared, etc., but my dad is too compliant with conventional medicine BS. That´s why I´m just focusing into the DDW with him, at least right now, since I already got at home some 18 ppm DDW and he still hasn´t even sipped a bit of it.

    I have finished Gabor´s book and also found this recent paper on DDW and pancreatic cancer, pretty damm promising given the horrible prognosis of this type of cancer: https://journals.sagepub.com/doi/10.1177/1073274821999655

    The study was done with people with stage IV inoperable pancreatic cancer, some of them with metastasis, so I guess they were initially a bit worse than my father is right now. People who only did conventional treatment (chemotherapy, I believe) had a medial survival time of 6 months and a bit, and people consuming DDW in adition to the conventional treatment had a MST of 19 months, more than triple. What is more impressing, if I understood correctly, is that in this last group, people who didn´t to single but repeated treatments had a mean survival rate (MST) of ALMOST 72 MONTHS!!! ALMOST 6 FREAKING YEARS, FROM JUST 6 MONTHS OF CONVENTIONAL TREATMENT, THAT IS A 12 FOLD INCREASE IN MEAN SURVIVAL RATE!! And I believe that some of these patients were still alive at the time of publishing the study, so it could be more.

    However I´m still not sure if I interpreted/read this study correctly, sounds pretty damm good. Also I don´t know what a "single treatment" and "repeated treatments" mean, I guess it refers not to a single or more DDW consumtion, but probably to longer periods. Also it could be that people who didn´t make it to the 72 months with DDW was not cause of DDW discontinuation but just cause they happened to die before.

    I don´t know, but it looks very good so I showed the paper to my dad highliting all this stuff, he real a bit and said he would read a bit of Gabor´s book.

    In conclusion, I´m still trying to get my dad informed about DDW and drinking it ASAP, Gabor talks about begining with 85 ppm in agresive cancer like my dad´s, though I´m a bit worried cause he also says it can cause abcceses from tumor necrosis and that could cause some harm. My plan probably would be for him to begin 105 ppm and if he tolerates well maybe going 85 ppm after just a couple of weeks. However, I´d really prefer for him to get a consult with an especialist in DDW, either Lazlo Boros, Gabor Somlayi, Kruse or someone who is available and if my dad consents. I´m working on it this days, my parents tend to trust too much conventional medicine and too little his crazy son (me).

    Thanks for suggestions, probably a lot of good stuff but I´m trying to focus right now in the low hanging fruit/easiest for my dad to do and to comply with and maybe more effective which I have a sense could be DDW. He won´t get in IR and CT I believe at this time. Tomorrow he gets his second chemo treatment, I ´ll keep posted, thanks to all.
    John Schumacher and JanSz like this.
  13. Pablo

    Pablo New Member

    Connecting with the CT suggestion made by @John Schumacher, I remember this video I saw the other day of a guy reversing last stage liver cancer with CT, we need more stories like this out there!!!

    John Schumacher likes this.
  14. JanSz

    JanSz Gold

  15. Pablo

    Pablo New Member

    A month ago or so they saw a reduction in tumor size and they said it could be operable, but they needed to see in the surgery when they open him. He went to surgery 2 days ago, thursday morning. After 4 hours or so a girl calls us and say it has gone bad. The found some "infiltrations in his stomach (I guess that means metastases??) and then they saw liver metastases, so they could not take anything out. She said it would be a question of months for him to die. My mom almost faints. I thought I´d cry like crazy but I didn´t, somwhow I hold myself pretty good.

    He´s now in hospital, I was with him yesterday afternoon and will go again today. He has not taking any DDW. He went in summer to the hospital with the paper on DDW on pancreatic cancer to the doctor and he said patients/family often take random studies and he could not recommend, etc. I wanted to have gon myself to the doc, I had prepared not only 1 study on DDW and pancreatic cancer, but a whole bunch of them with good results on other cancers, plus Somylai´s book. But my dad said he wanted to go with my mom but without me, he did not expose the thing right.

    I think what burns the most for me is not the cancer or my dad´s dying itself, but even much more seen him dying at 65 as an option for continous bad choices. I don´t know it it is 100% acurate but I think his early dying is a big part his fault, and that is what burns me the most. People tell me "it´s such bad luck", but I see it as bad thinking on his part, lack of openess, stupidity. Also from my mom. I´ve been warning them about ALAN and cancer a few years now, about nnEMF, etc. Sad part is my dad is the only one who kind of listened and even read some info I gave him. He is a really good person, shares, listens, is very sweet etc... But he hasn´t received the message I´ve consistently tried to give him, it´s sad.

    It´s sad not being able to save even my dad. I´m not sure what % this was caused by the covid jab, nnEMF from his tablet over his organs, blue light, too much carbs, etc. But pretty sure these all are big culprits-

    Just send a message to support@jackkruse.com , to try to get a consult with Jack if I can afford. I don´t like leeting go, my idea is to convince dad however I freaking can to dring 25 or 18 ppm DDW like mad, get him on blueblockers and installing a ton of DE filters or whole house filter, and hope for the miracle. It s crazy that I find difficult compliance from my dad to drink DDW which has safe profile when he´ll be dead soon, but he took the vaccine, experimental, for a 99,8 survival rate thing, it´s crazy
    caroline likes this.
  16. caroline

    caroline New Member

    so sorry Pablo........
  17. @Pablo - You are not alone. Our collective heart on this forum hurt deeply with you.

    Each of us have a story - for those who did not listen nor change for their own sake even when the "truth" seems so compelling.

    You tried - you offered your best - as you stated above, your Dad chose his path, making his journey. Remember the good he did in your life and the lives of others.

    May your journey be dramatically different ...

    Knowing what you've learned - the zip code impacts your epigenetics​

    You will need stronger light-water-magnetism in order to overcome your genetics.

    Please consider the sacrifices (financially & personally) necessary to make your changes. Not all of us have the means to move (right now); but if you have time, you can put away (safe up) for it. Find a way to support yourself in such a way that you will be able to do that "profession" at a desirable location. It will take work; but I believe its worth it. ;)

    Grandpa John
    Last edited: Nov 26, 2022
    JanSz likes this.
  18. Sue-UK

    Sue-UK New Member

    I'm so sorry Pablo ... My father died of stomach cancer 20 years ago, when there wasn't the same technology, but I watched my mother's agony when he was first diagnosed that it was somehow her fault because of what she had cooked for him to eat, the very occasional use of a microwave .... but although he had given up years before, he had been a pipe smoker thinking it was safer than cigarettes, had numerous vaccinations in the army, drank alcohol daily .... He had surgery not chemo, but when it was done I think at some level he knew (as I did) that his life was measured in months, not years, because there were already signs in nodes outside of the stomach, which eventually went to the liver. Back then without the internet the only info readily available was books in the health food shop on anti cancer diets. Despite having his stomach removed, he let my mother put him on an anti cancer diet, which made her feel she was doing something, when in hindsight it would probably have been better to think in terms of quality of life being able to eat what he fancied.

    Your dad looked at the information you gave him, and not only has he not drunk DDW, but he didn't take you with him to share the information with the doctors, and it is you looking to get an appointment with Jack. He may not be able to verbalise not having the energy to fight anymore, or be thinking of the financial and emotional toll the "fight" it will have on those he loves.

    With the vaccines, what's done is done, and he's had chemo, and he may not want to give your mother false hope, all nuances that may also be influencing his decisions. The real question is what does he want to do, or not do, and even if his choice is not to fight it by anything you (or Jack) recommend, he and your mother may well be open to ideas to support quality of life during his final months, even if that doesn't involve a tech or home nnemf overhaul.

    I've seen papers on spirulina and pancreatic cancer such as this one
    Anti-angiogenic effects of the blue-green alga Arthrospira platensis on pancreatic cancer

    This one is about a small human trial with chemo

    The efficacy of dietary Spirulina as an adjunct to chemotherapy to improve immune function and reduce myelosuppression in patients with malignant tumors

    I've also looked at some info online about chlorella and cancer, mainly linked to chlorophyll, but just using the chlorophyll compound is missing a few tricks, for example chlorella as a prebiotic and potentially a good source of spermidine .....

    From what I've seen on youtube, the spike proteins in both covid and the vaccines interfere with the spermidine machinery in the cell, (and spermidine production already reduces with aging ... )

    Even if your Dad decides not to fight it, with the risk of getting covid itself and the implications of that to the timescale of an already devastating prognosis, your parents might be open to using chlorella and spirulina. (My neighbour has had 4 jabs but still caught covid twice :eek:). Although it was on healthy subjects this gives an idea of the potential of chlorella.
    Beneficial immunostimulatory effect of short-term Chlorella supplementation: enhancement of Natural Killer cell activity and early inflammatory response (Randomized, double-blinded, placebo-controlled trial)

    Activation of the human innate immune system by Spirulina: augmentation of interferon production and NK cytotoxicity by oral administration of hot water extract of Spirulina platensis

    Although they look like a supplement, they are food crops, and I use spirulina and chlorella because at 65 I'm unvaxxed in a UK winter, and any cancer protective properties that don't involve light water and magnetism are a bonus. The chlorella I use is 0.9 mg per gram spermidine, and I take chlorella and spirulina in tiny easy to swallow tablets by the handful. With their nutritional profile it could be a useful tool for your Dad, particularly during periods of low appetite. If they help autophagy and improve mitochondrial function and make him feel better for longer, or think better, he may become open to other things.

    But even if he doesn't agree to trying DDW, don't regret later that you spent time trying to convince him any freeking way you could to do something he didn't want to do, risking your relationship with your mum, or there being an undercurrent during his last months. I didn't agree with the surgery being done on my dad, but even if I'd had useful information to offer about an alternative to surgery, at the end of the day when the bad news came it was his choice to accept it, and spend his last days with love and laughter. He had a chance to put his financial affairs in order, and died knowing how much he was loved, and that my mother wouldn't have to sort out the finances, and would be emotionally supported, with no regrets, no recriminations about decisions made as a couple or what could have been done differently. I think he would have seen that as me and my brothers gift to him.

    Sending you love Pablo. xx
  19. Anne V

    Anne V Silver

    I am so sorry Pablo. It is very tough to accept that loved one do not want to hear about or try what could help. But it is their life
    and their choice. Maybe this prayer might help you: God grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, The courage to change
    the things I can, and the wisdom to know the difference.
    John Schumacher, JanSz and Inger like this.
  20. Pablo

    Pablo New Member

    Thank you all, I love you, I hope to meet you in person one day.

    Today I went again to see him, briefly, to the hospital, I talked about my am running and calisthenics with friends, and about things I need to do for work this week, and some stuff I found funny. I enjoyed it, kind of light talk, then he touches my arm and kind of compels me to go, I shake his hand informally, like with friends, and go. You can express so much more with touch than with words, its weird but i like it, I don´t need to tell him I love him bla bla, he knows. It´s like magic

    And I like I´m not crazy emotional with dad, mom, or brother. I didn´t cry since the hospital thing, obviously I had emotions but I was able to hold it decently, probably cause it was needed. Funny thing, I just cried 2 minutes ago writing second paragraph, but cause I´m looking inside too much, maybe. It´s weird this emotions thing.

    Yesh I think about that a lot, thanks, try to have that phrase in mind (I think is a stoic thing) but it is not 100% clear if I can change dad´s mom´s and bro´s (or whoever´s) mind about something, I know I will try again, but in a moment when I estimate, I feel that my suggestion won´t cause too much trauma around, like in the long term what´s the best action I can take? Being annoying with "crazy shit not scientifically proven, for them" is not improving his probably short time here, you know. But also I know it will burn me inside too crazy if I don´t feel I have really tried my best, or somewhere not to far from my best.

    Anyways, I´m trying lo take something good from this, like:

    - Instrocpection, learning about myself, I think you can learn so much in difficult and extreme situations. Can be fascinating
    - I can use the burning emotion to workout like mad (did this morning and planning to do a ton)
    - Can use it for CT like mad
    - For not giving a damm about minute things we sometimes, often, overthink, overreact, etc. Let go much more
    - For sharing what we learn here, safe, improve other´s lifes
    - Change the world

    See you
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