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LilRedDgirl's Help Me! Journal

Discussion in 'My Optimal Journal' started by lilreddgirl, Sep 17, 2015.

  1. Jack Kruse

    Jack Kruse Administrator

    We do..........its called the Gulf South.
    lilreddgirl likes this.
  2. lilreddgirl

    lilreddgirl New Member

    Jack I'm gonna move in with you for free lol :) but no airplanes

    What if you organized an Optimal clinic there?
  3. Jack Kruse

    Jack Kruse Administrator

    Nothing is free.........in fact the best things in life require effort money and pain and failure. That is why most people remain unhappy. They refuse to do what they must so they remain as they are.
  4. Jack Kruse

    Jack Kruse Administrator

    Clinic is well underway................members know it.
    Cpt.Tired and lilreddgirl like this.
  5. Scompy

    Scompy Gold

    Okay, gotta share this one 'cause lilreddgirl mentioned about CTing and hoping for support. It can work both ways. My 6-year old is very mathematical with his imaginary games. All of his bad-guys vs. good-guys use health values, damage values, defenses (versus armor), resistances (vs. other damage sources), attack types and so forth. Some of his favorite attacks are flame, ice, lightning, infirned (magic), emerald-diamonds and the most powerful, plasma. He fully understands the concept of resistances for specific damage-mitigation against particular damage types.

    Now, my 6-year old not only asks when I'm going to do some CT, but he has *forced* me to do CT in the bathtub at times. He prides himself on having "full cold resistances" and when he stuck his arms or legs in my ice-cold water, he just shook his head and says, "no, this isn't that bad." He likes to assist the effort by dropping ice cubes into the tub as close as possible to my chest because I over-react-pretent to being struck with such a powerful ice-attack to feed his mental games. To be honest, it's far more of a challenge to get comfortable and acclimated with him around. You have to imagine a kid throwing ice in the tub, dipping his hand in and splashing you with the cold water, and when all the ice has been added, then placing the ice on your neck, shoulders and other exposed flesh on purpose.
    jwhb77 and Jude like this.
  6. lilreddgirl

    lilreddgirl New Member

    hehe this feels lovely I feel supported here :)

    I love the getting and giving/sharing everything free... before I got sick my business plan was to help people 'on a donation basis' so that access could stay free...

    I've learned some things take practice and (baby)steps and getting back on track...

    :) like those familiar words, that I once took a lot of practice and babysteps to shift out my thoughts and get to my secret soft feminine way of being in the world...: 'effort' and 'pain' and 'failure' and 'must' and even 'money' . They're so masculine :) lol.

    It feels reassuring Jack thinks this way. This I call 'strong' in the world :)

    Well with these protocols and practice we're doing here, Jack's words remind me I can draw on my strong masculine side to take care of me now...
    somehow I will translate it all into soft :)

    and if i 'fail' I will get back on track... it's a choice to do 'effort' and it's a choice to stay the same. neither is intrinsically 'better' regardless of what people judge. it's a choice on what I want. lets see... I brought myself happiness from unhappiness before. I called it 'free' and 'practice' and 'babysteps' and 'getting back on track' to Experience it ...
    if I were a man I might have called it pain, and effort, and failure and what you must ... I know why I didn't call it that :) ... because then it wouldn't feel like Happiness to soft little girl me
  7. lilreddgirl

    lilreddgirl New Member

    Oh God that sounds insanely lovely! Sigh... :)

    my resistance is thoroughly melted...

    Between Jack, me, and you, I feel very happy and seen and motivated tonight... thank you!

    I'm not worried now I know I will do this... it's taking care of me! I did 30 days of hugging ice on meds... I am strong :) and a great soft, comforting translator to boot...
    Scompy likes this.
  8. Cpt.Tired

    Cpt.Tired New Member

    In Sweden they have actual full towns that are designed for people with electrosensitivity.

    The Europeans get the message loud and clear on this issue. Most people over there have had a reasonable education in physics so it sounds plausible to most.
    But here in North America the denial is mostly amongst American men who at the most have had one year of physics.
    I'm quoting Dr Dietrich Klinghardt, a doctor who has a practice in both Germany and Seattle. Check out his video on YouTube "Smart meters- the health crisis of our time"
    Was the 'Ben Greenfield' webinar downloaded or streaming(?)
    If it was streaming...bad girl (lol). I know it's a hassle. But then you take that variable out of the equation at least.
    God! I'm so frustrated with my wife (who has MS). Since her symptoms are in remission she is not concerned about EMF at all. The EMF here really isn't very bad but it could be better. We are still sleeping in a relatively weak wifi signal from the neighbours. We have a Magnetico 20 gauss. I modified the cordless phone to drastically reduce the strength but if it was up to me I would be doing much much more. I probably would feel much better by now if I was 'allowed' to do what I need to do (like paint the bedroom with wifi blocking paint, chuck the cordless phone, rewire living areas with shielded wire, etc.)

    I don't know.. I just want to get my redox high enough and STABLE enough to make some big decisions. (Like maybe saying 'bye bye')
    When I do enter that high redox state the path is just laid out in front of you. One thing I did forget to mention in my 'success' story is that I am still on stimulant medication so if everything is working just right you can quite easily get that high redox feeling but I am sure eventually I can reach it without the meds.

    We are just so at odds when it comes to living a healthy life that it has really driven us apart which is sad. The EMF is SERIOUSLY affecting her. She's saturated in it for probably a good 12 hours a day! Yet she just totally denies it.
    It really makes me feel like I'M the one who has the problem. After all that's 'all that I talk about' and 'constantly researching it', etc. Thats because I've hit a road block with it.
    Everything else will have little effect if I don't deal with the big problem.
    jwhb77 and Scompy like this.
  9. lilreddgirl

    lilreddgirl New Member

    The webinar was downloaded not streaming. I still get tightness just listening to it on the old non-touchscreen ipod mini... streaming is not something I do because it feels bad to me rather than just from intelligent avoidance. I get ''help' avoiding it from my symptoms kicking up.

    I feel for you with the difference of opinions in the family. As important as it is for us to pursue what we want - health - I'm not sure that being as demanding on others will really help us live a 'better' life. I remember Dr. Kruse said it took him 3 years to have his wife and family on board, and that was after he actually Showed dramatic improvements, some easy to see because he was no longer obese. I think with other diseases it may be more difficult to show that improvements are happening on the outside and that they're due to our protocols. Because this is such pioneering thinking, it's not necessarily going to be easy to find others in the same wavelength and necessarily connect with them as life partners as well. Biologic health and longevity is crucially important, yet there are other ideas about lifestyle that can also be crucially important - ideas about how to raise children, how to work with money, how to conduct relationships for example come to mind... and these again people may not completely agree on. For example, I may think it's extremely important to raise children with non-violent communication and without coercion, something quite challenging to implement in view of society's habits. I may think this is crucial to emotional development, overall health, and societal benefit as these habits get passed on. On the other hand, someone else may prioritize biologic health protocols and limiting choices to those considered healthy, even if coercion is included. As much as we want what we want for ourselves, alienating ourselves may or may not serve us. After all, as healthy as we can become, we are not invulnerable to life's unpredictabilities. A tragic example is that we may enjoy great health only to fall victim to an accident.

    This feels difficult and just adds another layer to the challenge we face in healing ourselves. I'm sorry you're struggling, and I've heard others on forum concerned with having or finding partners that are on board. I'm feeling concerned myself about this too. I am going to go with the idea of connecting with partners who are supportive of what I want to do for me, in view of my health challenges, whether or not they are on board with it for themselves. In some cases this may be enough, and in other cases it may be too much to take on...

    That kind of widens to society, I don't think from personal experience that Europeans (in general) get the message loud and clear on EMFs at all, or that in North America it's due to limited understanding of physics. I think 'society bashing' people for not getting it is kind of counterproductive (and addictive)... people don't get what they're not familiar with, and that's just what's going on right now in the world. We're not any smarter honestly, just better informed due to circumstances that led our particular curiosity to Dr. Kruse. It would be lovely to have a focus on disseminating the ideas and creating an environment - like the blog - where people at large could become more and more familiar with them, rather than complaining about what idiots they are for not knowing what they do not know. Or for resisting new ideas - natural human behavior. (I suppose complaining about the ignorance of others when feeling alienated is natural human behavior too :) )

    I feel really intrigued when people use skills like non-triggering communication to get out and repeat their message enough that it becomes heard. Dr. Kruse I believe does it with a shock factor - and that has merit for some who are drawn in by challenge, but there are other ways I've seen where the message just builds up without shock... just consistently and clearly repeats itself until it's familiar enough to be 'got.' Not challenging, just consistent.
    jwhb77, Scompy and Cpt.Tired like this.
  10. Cpt.Tired

    Cpt.Tired New Member

    It sounds like you got a really good charge today:) because that all made a lot of sense. When I have a better charge I'm much more accepting of the way things are in life and just kind of go with it with a smile on my face. It's when my charge is low..that's when I have to learn to keep my mouth shut.I should always actually keep my mouth shut because I may have a good charge one day and say a few controversial things that invites ridicule on days that I have a low charge :mmpft:
    Yep..you are right. We should only really lead by example. As hard as that can be sometimes.
    lilreddgirl likes this.
  11. lilreddgirl

    lilreddgirl New Member

    I'm feeling great lately :) Why I do not know... but today I felt moved almost to tears reading about Dia's wonderful health successes with indoor light hacks:


    I went to Home Depot and finally for under $8 I got this and this:

    [​IMG] Just a regular FEIT brand 13W blacklight bulb

    and this:

    [​IMG] a plug in lightbulb socket...

    I'm taking some steps while days outside keep being cloudy... :)

    I know one 13Watt bulb is not a strong dose but I also understand it's good to start with a small dose.

    Question: How close should I be to it while I'm exposing my skin to it? I'm planning to expose most of my skin to it for a planned 1 hour a day... it might also be on all night if it doesn't disturb my sleep when I try it.
    nikita, Cpt.Tired, Dia and 2 others like this.
  12. Dia

    Dia Gold

    @lilreddgirl , I have read your journal, and I can relate to some of your issues. The tingling in fingers, numbness ect.... use to be me, and I know it had to do with EMF. I couldn't touch my phone because I hated the tingling feeling, and then the tingling would turn into numbness. Those have all been resolved, and don't even how it could have happened so fast, it's baffling to me, but it has. Just keep moving forward. You're on the right track, it will get better. Don't know if your context is the same as mine with regards to the black light, but Dr K suggested surrounding myself with them. I have one under my desk at me feet (bare legs), a foot and half away, one by my computer screen and one above my head, plus I have the Solar Glo above me as well. That maybe excessive, but when I was using one black light I didn't notice much. I get better results with more.... my context I guess....
    lilreddgirl likes this.
  13. Cpt.Tired

    Cpt.Tired New Member

    That's like the one I got. I put it in a reptile clamp lamp and clamped it right next to my computer. (I tried to load the pict. but the file was too large). I'm about a foot away from the light.
    Thanks for that link...I was able to get a pretty good idea as to why I haven't been getting anything out of the light lately:
    The UV and IR, although it was working great, was also somehow creating headaches. I started taking some lysine (4000mg a day) because I figured that it may be aggravating some viruses in my eye. Lysine is a vasoconstrictor. We need vasodilation (NO) to assimulate UV light. Since I've cut back on the lysine I'm starting to feel better. I also did a lot of cold showering today (phoned in sick with a headache, of course due to no lysine)
    On to the next biohack!
    lilreddgirl likes this.
  14. lilreddgirl

    lilreddgirl New Member

    1st day: So far Not so Good

    Remember that great feeling I had been having throughout the day? Yesterday evening after a good 5 hours of Blueblocking glasses on I was feeling nice and sleepy and decided to try my new blacklight for a couple hours...

    I instantly felt very AWAKE and energized and euphoric. I kinda worried that it may have been something like some Blue in the light causing it, but either way I felt pumped! I laid down to sleep and did fall asleep for an hour until a noise woke me and I turned the blacklight off (I only planned to use it for a short time to build up my familiarity with it).

    Well after as I lay back to sleep I didn't feel as 'dark' behind my eyes as I was used to...

    And in the morning I woke up feeling tired, sluggish... not my Great feeling self like I have been feeling on these cloudy days. I didn't feel like cooking my BAB which I have been happy and looking forward to the past few days, my appetite was low too, everything took a long time... sluggishness! I put the light on in morning too but no euphoria and ENERGY like I felt at night. The slumpy feeling lasted into the afternoon...

    Oh no! I felt like I threw off what must have been a pretty great rhythm. Is it because there's blue in it? Is it because I'm not used to the light and its UV? I'm definitely not using it tonight before bed. I did use it for several hours in the afternoon.
    Last edited: Dec 9, 2015
    Cpt.Tired likes this.
  15. Scompy

    Scompy Gold

    From my personal experiences, I don't usually infer too much about one-off events, though it's absolutely possible what you are saying that it's not agreeing with you. There's no replacing the real thing with the real cycles of the day. The 'when' part of using a biohack is also part of the formula. The more data points you get, the more you'll know. Definitely a hard thing to test. I personally view biohacks as temporary. Focus on the thing you want: the sun. Then, work toward getting it more frequently. It's the same reason why I'm going on vacations soon to AZ, but even that's sort of a biohack for my situation here in Seattle. I'm going to have to work toward figuring out how to move.

    Similar...I watched a Christmas perfomance earlier this week at my son's school. All I brought with me was a hat, and the idiots had on full, powerful fluorescent lights during half of the performance. This was a 8pm at night. Also, every parent was snapping light-bursting camera flashes at the kids and all around the room for 1+ hours. I was cringing thinking about how all of the kids, not only past their normal bedtimes, were gonna have severe melatonin loss that night and then 3-5 days later, most come down with sicking and then attribute the sickness to all being in the same room passing disease rather than all being in the same room zapping their melatonin and altering their circadian cycles. I got my son out of there immediately, but guess what happpened to me that night? I woke up at 3am and really couldn't get back to sleep for the rest of the night. My brain had been reprogrammed to a 'new sun' 7 hours past at the 8pm fluorescent Christmas performance, even with my cap on. Luckily my son was asleep the whole night.
    lilreddgirl and nikita like this.
  16. Inger

    Inger Silver

    I get sleepy when I have my blacklight on before bedtime, it feels like moonlight for me, and I have no trouble sleeping in moonlight either. I really like it :) But I do not stare into it.. I use it to lighten up my room. It looks beautiful because I have a white coach and pictures on the wall that looks pretty with it :)
    I often am nude or half nude to let it shine on my body tho
    But I have no lights on in my horsebarn, no blackligt either. Maybe I should try it once to see if it affects sleep.....

    I know the feeling how people (partner etc.) can make you feel it is something wrong with you because you live so different........
    but when you are 10000% sure you are right, it does not bother me at all. I just get stronger. It is like the truth gives you crazy powers somehow..
    And I KNOW.. the way nature shows us, is the right way. Of course! It is so simple :)

    I think we can be strong and soft on the same time :) I find it so fascinating that a thing can be many things in one.... it is very cool! :)
    somehow it is sexy :)
    Cpt.Tired and lilreddgirl like this.
  17. Cpt.Tired

    Cpt.Tired New Member

    I felt the same as you the first few times with the light: Brain stimulation and could not fall asleep. I had absolutely terrible sleep for a few nights but the weird thing that I noticed was that the next day at work, I felt fine. In fact I felt better than I have felt previously with plenty of :zzz:zs.

    I'm not sure if maybe the SCN or some other pathways are adjusting to finally being used more efficiently or something but like Scompy indicated; it's only a one time thing so I wouldn't worry about it. For example: I felt like absolute crap yesterday but today I felt the exact opposite!( But that was mostly due to the fact that I realized that I had completely depleted my vitamin b5 stores. For me B5 is the 'confidence vitamin'. Taken with l-tyrosine and 5HTP and I can feel very good if the time is right. Today I must have taken over 10000 mg of it spread out over the day. I really did need that much because I could feel when I was running out.
    Caffeine and other stimulants plus just stress will harshly deplete stores.
    There are other things that will alter your ability to assimulate the UV I'm finding out. I think anything that acts like a vasoconstrictor might do that. That happened to me earlier this week (too much lysine)
    lilreddgirl likes this.
  18. Cpt.Tired

    Cpt.Tired New Member

    Interesting that you say that it feels like moonlight. That is exactly what I thought:). Maybe the moon and stars give off some UV light and maybe this is why it is okay to have it on around the clock (?)
  19. Lahelada

    Lahelada New Member

    Lilredd, it may or may not have been. My hunch is that just before bed is not the best time for starting with black light. DonT forget if your DC. Circuit is not strong yet you will be all dressed up with nowhere to go. As with anything you will need to build it up gradually. DHA should be on your radar for that.

    On a different subject a recent article on Green bank VA. From the comments you will see that the Europeans are not so open minded either...
    Scompy likes this.
  20. lilreddgirl

    lilreddgirl New Member

    Thanks Lahleda, I've been practicing just having the blacklight shining on me during the day into the early evening, then reverting to my blue blockers. This has kept me my usual sleepy into the evening.

    I've been getting DHA daily too (I mostly have half a pound of seafood a day as I've heard Jack mention on blog awhile back) and been on the Epi-Paleo for 18months now, I actually think my DHA levels might be pretty good due to that... also because during the summer and indian summer here I'm able to get a lot of midday sun in without burning, I also had a somewhat fast and no detox symptom adaptation to CT when I practiced that in August and September.

    I guess I will keep using the blacklight during the day and see about adding other lights as well.

    (I also recently read that article about Green Bank, but gosh it felt bad to read.)
    Last edited: Dec 11, 2015
    Cpt.Tired likes this.

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