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Hope Rising....

Discussion in 'My Optimal Journal' started by Hope, Mar 29, 2013.

  1. Hope

    Hope Gold

    I've been on the forum since last fall and have not done a journal, mostly because I didn't feel like I was ready or "good enough" yet. But the whole 'thing' with EMF - as if none of the other stuff hasn't - has really gotten to me and I have to come out and be accountable now. I haven't even finished reading all the EMF blogs - I keep going back to EMF 4 as I really want to get it and it's got a hold on me....but with the webinar and Q&A getting me thinking so much I decided to journal after all. Monday I ordered a sleep magnetico pad; waiting for my Trifield meter.

    I keep thinking about my health, my history.I figured out last year (pre-JK) that at least three generations of women before me must have had thyroid issues, and mine didn't really show until I got bronchitis that turned into pneumonia in 1998 in my mid 20s (the best years of your life? Not for me), which would alter the course of my life forever. Candida, chronic fatigue/mono/EBV, then severe obstructive sleep apnea (though I was never obese, my heaviest 165 lbs at 68 inches), peppered with digestive issues and mercury and heavy metal toxicity, adrenal burnout, the works.

    I studied nutrition and changed my diet, settling on a whole foods/no processed foods, low carb, no grain diet with healthy fats and protein thanks to Weston A Price. I hadn't heard of paleo then. I lost weight and felt somewhat better but never fully recovered energy-wise, and still haven't. I'm turning 40 later this year, and I don't remember my 30s being great, except for one year, 2005. I felt mostly old all these years, though I forced and pushed myself a lot. Even excellent MD's would call my diet 'near perfect' and yet, no one could really fix me. And though some of my labs look not bad (HS CRP, D, HDL), it's the thyroid and (female) hormones I am having trouble balancing....and I'm so convinced of the role EMF has played. Thanks to JK, I'm starting to understand it....

    At age 26 I moved for my first full time job in the US - lived on the 17th floor of a huge apt building and worked on the 20th floor of a high-rise in the literal center of town. I was miserable. My 'cube' was dark for the first year and a half, no daylight from windows. I felt depressed but so happy when, outside for lunch, between all the high buildings, I'd see a bird in the little tiny public garden. I always had the desire to get outside - as a kid, in my 20s, now. I'd be outside any minute I could - even doing homework. I never knew it was Schumann and my EMF sensitivity. Whew. Though I lost my job two years later, when I did, physically I felt much better until I started another computer job.

    So now I have this HUGE desire to move. DH and I moved to the DC area three years ago. I have felt kinda 'burdened', except when I go to the park..and now I know why. But, DH isn't sold on anything EMF yet. He said last night, "just don't listen to that stuff", when it totally affects all of us and some of us more. We've used Stetzerizer filters for dirty electricity since 2010. It hasn't made much difference but it's just teardrops in the fire. Especially since 200 yards from us is a major power line I didn't see when we moved in....ahhhhhh.

    My sleep has gotten better since I installed darkening shades in Jan. '12, and did the leptin reset last fall. But, I still have bad nights, even with more dreams, and mostly low energy. I feel VERY different when I sleep at a friend's house in Shenandoah, where there is no wifi if I don't want it, and no cell phone coverage. DH thinks I am crazy but I.know.my.body.

    I love CT, whenever I do it and I prefer cool weather - humidity stinks but maybe this summer I'll tolerate it more? Growing up (and now too) we always had the windows open, even in the dead of winter... I don't do manis or pedis and get my hair cut once a year (it's long). I love what I eat (nothing raw yet) and especially fish. I was never much a meat eater as a kid, especially not red. But fish I loved even then, especially sardines and mackerel and Schillerlocken (smoked strips of belly wall from dogfish, still my favorite in Europe, but not cheap). I love being able to see my thinking change - even if I have a long path ahead of me and some bad days sometimes.

    My goal is to share my progress especially on the EMF front. The front, like a sea wall, because that's what it feels like but I'm nothing if not persevering. And when I read this post a year from now, to not only feel much better, but to have a chance, even at my 'advanced medical age', high FSH, low ovarian reserve, to conceive and carry to term a precious baby...using my own egg/s. Not sure if life will come through me, but I want to look back and know I did all I could. My mom, who turned 79 today, had me when she was 39, with one ovary and fibroid remnants in her uterus that gave my head a dent when I left the womb...anything is possible....
    Last edited: Feb 14, 2014
  2. caroline

    caroline Moderator

    Welcome Hope. Thanks so much for sharing your story. You certainly are a preserving young woman ....I love that about you. You need to take care of yourself 100% .... what could possibly be more important than that .

    Sometimes it isn't an easy or linear journey but it is an amazing journey to be sure and there is so much joy every where to become entangled !!!

    So many of us here have taken all this on board (baby steps) and are seeing our masterpiece unfold before our very eyes!

    I think we are all extraordinarily lucky ......
  3. Hope

    Hope Gold

    Thanks for your kind words, so appreciate them....and thanks for your amazing example on here!
  4. diane

    diane Gold

    So glad you started sharing Hope! The journal isn't about being perfect - it's about the journey and being able to look back and assess changes and progress. So you go girl! :)
  5. Inger

    Inger Silver

    Wow I just saw you got a journal too! And you ordered the meter! I love to read others journals. :) It is so much a N=1 testimonial! One can learn a lot that way, what to do and what to not do.

    Where in Germany did you live Hope? I lived in Hamburg for 10 years.. right at the outside of the city.. I loved it. The feeling where we lived was.. just beautiful! The nature too. We lived close to a nature reservat and a river. I di not know anything about grounding back them but I loved to walk barefoot to the river and sit in it in the summer. Made me feel so awesome!

    There are trains going by here too.. but I guess around 300 yards away or so? And there is a neighbour in between. And it is only a single train track. I hope it is not too bad..
  6. Hope

    Hope Gold

    Thanks Diane and Inger.....so sweet of you! :) I appreciate the reminder of not being perfect.......my thinking has definitely been off. It's crazy, but I am SO thankful I am starting to recognize much more deeply how off my thinking is.....that's the first step.

    Inger - that is awesome! Hamburg is beautiful and so close to the ocean, too! What brought you there??

    I lived in Bad Nauheim, a suburb of Frankfurt in the middle of the country....kinda funny cause Elvis Presley was stationed there in the 50s LOL. It was great. We had mineral springs (still there) and there was nature all around it. I could walk and in five minutes, nothing but fields. How I miss that..more than I can express in words. My friends and I would play in the little creeks of mineral water flowing to reach a collecting pool, and also in other creeks in the park. I was outside all the time - any time I could, and we played in the trees as well. Lots of free electrons. Great life. I did also swim a lot though - in chlorine pools and I was always tired after, and never got why!!!!!

    Anyway......I am sure 300 yards is better than right there. And, don't you live in the country? That must help too...I think.

    Can't wait to do the Trifield testing. I'm talking to Michael Neuert too next week...can't wait for that. I talked to his assistant last night and it was so great. She said she loves working for him, as his office (in No CA) is all grounded and she says she can totally tell the difference. I was so excited to hear that...I love talking to people who GET all this :)
  7. Hope

    Hope Gold

    So we went out for lunch today, first time in a year, and of course I was a bad girl, had some of the mashed potatoes atop the seafood pie I picked. Back to super low carb tomorrow. I brought my Trifield and was shocked at how even in a room, the readings can vary but up to 10 gauss(?) on the meter. Like, on my side it was 20-25, on my DH's 10-15. Whew.

    In the car, I noticed, the passenger side has higher readings than the driver side - that was shocking. It's a 2012 car. I hate that DH constantly has the bluetooth on. UGH. But must remember to get myself well.....

    When driving, as soon as we were near some major power lines (they seem to be everywhere around here), readings went up to 10 as well. And, at home, near *our* power line, thankfully far enough away from our TH, it jumped from about 4 to 7 as you got closer.....of course anything above 3 is bad.

    And on both sides of our house, I cannot get a reading of less than 3. The only place that happens is sometimes by the front door. Not sure why.

    I so wanna live in the country....I just don't know which part. Somehow have to figure out which is best, and then make some jobs happen there, and move. I wish that could be Finland. I read they have lots of trees there, more than any European country. But we'll see. If it took Dr K three years to do it, I guess it's OK for us to take time too.

    I have a feeling the Trifield meter will be a constant companion everywhere I go. My MD office - I have to wait a long time for the MD to be ready - and I am always exhausted....gotta be the EMF. Cause, if MD's can induce anesthesia in people/animals with EMF, it must be why I get tired...out of it etc. A small amount of it, ugh.

    I also have a feeling I will tire of the Trifield. I haven't been able to get much reading on the electric and RF scale, and I really want to. The iPhone didn't show much for some reason...hmmm. Gotta be that it's not sensitive enough?

    So the highest reading so far I have found on the electrical scale isn't the laptop (though it gets up to 4(*10) if close to the monitor) but my 2005 printer....whoa. Good thing I only turn it on when using it, which is rarely. It's literally off the charts (=100(*10)).
    Last edited: Mar 31, 2013
  8. Inger

    Inger Silver

    Hope.. I realize my thinking is off too.. many times.. This is a journey for sure. I always tell myself, good that I recognize something is wrong at least, or I could never change..

    I moved to Hamburg with hubs right after we married, I was 22 yo. He had to move away from here so I went with him. At first it was so hard but then it got better and then I started to love it..:) It was good for me to come away from family too. My parents have a very strong impact on family members because of their religious believes and control behavior. Actually very sad and it makes me still suffer a bit but I am way stronger now and I am better in protecting myself. Still much to learn though. It is quite sad to have to feel so foreign to own parents but that is how it goes when you start to walk your own path and it is way different.. need so much courage.. at least when you are raised and brainwashed into certain dogmas and believes that has little to do with reality. It is a weird, unreal world.. and it makes me feel sick in my stomach. Makes the reality just beautiful.. only because it is so REAL. In this process I sometimes had to take just something, like a cup or something, in my hand, and just touch it.. and it felt so... real. And I enjoyed that feeling so immensely, to touch this cup, to feel it in my hands, to say loud, wow this is a cup.. it is white. It is real. It brought tears in my eyes it felt so strong and so good. That is how much I come to appreciate the simple reality after being brainwashed all these years.
    Sad to see what all this has done with my siblings, and I have 14. I always loved them so dearly and took care of them like my own children. I am moving on. I need to understand they are not my responsibility anymore. I do understand it but in practice I sometimes struggle still.. Some things are tough to learn. very tough. But I always loved the tough reality somehow so it is not too bad..lol I am not going to stay here forever I guess. But I do enjoy all the beauty around me and it helps. I so love to live on the country, I do. We have neighbours but the closest is maybe 80 yards away and they are so nice, people that love and respect the nature.

    Here are lots of trees, yes. IDK... I sometimes think about going back to Germany. I somehow feel it would be good for me to live a bit far from family. We'll see.. Or I grow so strong the weird stuff has zero impact on me anymore..lol That would be the best thing ever huh! I do am open to the world.. feels good. I think too we can take some time, Hope! Needs to be wise decisions. And in the meanwhile we need to do everything right where we live, and we will grow wiser and healthier every day. Then we will know what to do. That is how I run at least. That is why I am not running away from here either even if it is sometimes not so easy. There is so much to learn!
    And yeah.. to focus on own healing.. only that. Wow it is a huge piece! The first thing to do. It is so easy to get distracted and start caring too much about others issues.. big mistake! We need to heal first. I have to tell myself this again and again..lol
  9. caroline

    caroline Moderator

    You are both such insightful and spectacular and caring young women Hope and Inger .....i feel so proud of your progress ...and mine too - and I feel very, very proud to know you- all of this makes my heart sing!

    Can you imagine where we will be 6 months from now ... or one year from now - our possibilities are endless and limitless .......
  10. Hope

    Hope Gold

    Dear Inger, wow, I had no idea....that is just amazing, your story. And I am so sorry. Your life is unfolding in incredible ways...and I know all will be so clear evermore as you get more and more optimal. It is so so hard when you grow up with controlling parents. My mom was very much like that - though in her case, it was just plain control (not religious), wanting everything her way (because it was best), I think, because her own father was extremely controlling too (which meant my mom and her brother both left home at age 18 - as soon as they could). I was (and mostly am, still, I guess) pretty messed up from that kind of upbringing though I am also thankful for all I learned, and am learning about me now, like that I am free to make my own choices...though yes it's hard. And I can see that whatever your past is, it has made you this amazing person, with the incredible wisdom and insight and tenderness and gentleness. It's like with Jack's knee...you might not be as amazing if not for all of it? And it is so wonderful that you have not allowed all this to make you bitter!!!

    Sadly my husband grew up in such an environment...though they were less kids and I was oblivious to it for a long time. I have very little contact with my in-laws (haven't gone to visit in almost 2 years - even my MD said don't go!), as it's just so stressful to me and it makes me sick, literally - last few times I got totally exhausted. I don't need that in my life (so I send cards and gifts, that's it) until I feel stronger physically. Of course it is difficult as DH wants me to go - he doesn't get it - but I can't do it. He won't move, and I can't do some things either. Sadly, my DH thinks I am controlling too, which I don't want to be and have to work on...he still doesn't understand the importance to me of having no artificial light at night....or wanting to reduce EMF by turning off wifi...or that I don't want to go out to eat (usually) so I am bad....I have to be very careful...

    I admire you so much for being able to still live there and it is good you love your family still too. I am glad you have somewhat your own space, and that you are surrounded by great nature, CT and amazing food. That will be so fascinating to see what your next step is....I personally dream of moving to Germany, I so miss the nature, the little towns...though I know there is EMF too, but life there - compared to the US - just isn't as crazy as it is here, at least not for me or my memory. Plus it's easier to get into nature....but mostly I think it's my heart that is longing for it. Deep deep in my soul, that's what I desire. My heart says, "live there" but I cannot right now since I have my DH....so I 'live' for going to visit there each year. And getting out in nature here whenever I can and working on DH to move further out of DC, at least. I am so glad spring is coming...

    You said your siblings aren't your responsibility - that is really great....they shouldn't be. I have no doubt you will continue to be an amazing model to them, in every way!!!!

    Funny, I was 22 when I moved to the US and you 22 when you moved to Germany.....that's pretty young to move to a different culture. I can imagine Finland is even more amazing than Germany....but I am certain it will all be clear to you, when the time is right - and it will be amazing for sure. I have a feeling that just as you taught yourself to be free...you will help others as well!!

    Thank you so so much for sharing.....I so appreciate your beautiful heart, soul and mind.
  11. Hope

    Hope Gold

    Audrey, you are so sweet. And yes, I hope to be in a better place than where I am now in six months...still dreaming of that baby too :) And you are such an inspiration too...I know you are going to be in an amazing place six months from now. And, if I may tell you - I did NOT somehow realize that you are in your 60s (if I read this right?)....I have totally been 'picturing' you in your 40s. I was floored yesterday when I realized it. :) It must be your beautiful heart and youthful spirit -- NOT that 60s is 'old' by any means, especially not when you're on THIS path :)
    Last edited: Apr 1, 2013
  12. Hope

    Hope Gold

    So today I did my first ever CT in nature - only up to my knees, as the lake near me, they don't allow you to swim or go deep. I do love that lake....I wonder what the water temperature was...maybe mid-40s? Weather was in mid 50s. The first few times I could only go up to my ankles, and after 15 seconds, they hurt really bad so I had to take breaks. But then later, I went up to my knees, first for one minute, and another and then 3 minutes. When I got out the last time, my calves were nice and pink. My feet were all tingly afterwards....for maybe 30 minutes or so.

    Inger, I thought of you - how long do you stay in your ice hole??

    I thought of Caroline too. I didn't stay at the lake too long after the CT.....but loved watching all the different birds flying and singing....

    I slept really well, though I expected not to because I had some potatoes yesterday when we went out for lunch (which we hadn't done in 51 weeks)....and I was so hungry, I ate most of them. I was thankful for that. I got a lot of work done, which I was thankful for... yesterday I actually cleaned up and organized my closet LOL but it feels so good. I am giving away more clothes. I also really want to sell some used things soon so we have more space and less clutter. I really am enjoying going through the whole 1200 sq ft and seeing what we can get rid of.....so freeing.

    I tested the one CF light I remembered we have, in that closet and wow, the only place that I could get the Trifield meter to show some RF radiation, whew. Definitely need to change it.

    Also, on the way down to the lab where I had labs drawn today, I noticed how much radiation there is with the car running in certain places. Funny thing, the area in front of the lab building - 300 yard from train tracks - had less magnetic radiation than our own house. Ha!!

    Food was a struggle today....I had no desire to cook. I had my usual sardines for BF with sauerkraut, horseradish and mustard - that's never an issue...lunch was beef broth with mushroom and almond butter and then dinner was mushrooms and an avocado and almond butter, with a little cocoa powder again. I made some cod but it didn't come out edible, first time ever LOL. I am not even wanting veggies, mushrooms are good though. All I want is fat, somehow. It's so weird.
  13. Hope

    Hope Gold

    Just got the EMF webinar #1...wishing DH would listen with me :)
  14. caroline

    caroline Moderator

    Hope - have you tried the Nutiva coconut mana? It is so delicious! I got a jar for the first time 2 weeks ago and ate the whole thing in one week! I have now ordered the 5lb pack ...can't wait for it to get here.

    yep - my age - don't like to think about it too much but it is what it is and I feel/look better than I have in years and am in a much better place.......now if JK would just stop mentioning it when he is talking to me....

    Maybe there is some Quantum Magic that can turn back the hands of time ..... wait a minute...... I kind of feel that that has already happened actually!
    I am a lucky girl!
  15. Inger

    Inger Silver

    Hope.. IDK about having a beautiful heart and soul and mind, to be honest. I feel quite cruel at times. And it is not easy for me to find the "balance". Sometimes stuff is just too weird. But I work on it, and I try to get silent.. in my mind. That always help. And the nature help, and the beauty, and other people.. can be just a foreigner in the shop - they give me so much! Interesting you hubs has had same experiences. To me it is always a bit hard when holidays and the house full of action. this Easter my younger brother converted fully to my parents believes/religion. he gave himself up for it. He is now one of them. He got a car, money (works in my parents company now).. when you are a part of the community and fully obedient (which spend a big part of its time to talk bad about others) you get blessed. It was under development for a week or so and now it fulfilled. Around the same time he started to not care too much about what he eat either. God helps us feel great when we obey him, we need to not worry about foods. He loves sweets and to bake and needless to say he serves this "good stuff" to my parents and they all praise God together and thanks him for giving those gifts to them.. In front of my other heavily drugged mentally sick bro. But my mom cut he's hair and he's beard and he put clothes on my parents like and now he is all of a sudden "almost healthy", "way better in just one day", don't you see?! I can only see the same drugged guy that behaves like a zombie.. but for my parents the surface was maybe always the important thing I guess (?). Maybe they like zombies. They always obey. Never question. I have to work hard to not lose my sanity huh (sometimes..lol). But Hope, the funny thing is - it all depends on how we look at stuff that is for sure! That is the secret and I know it is true even if I do not always succeed.

    This kind of sound way worse than it is... lol

    My little sister was here too and she lives in Norway and she is so cute. She has a awesome boyfriend in USA, Missouri, and she might move there one day. We plan to take a trip there together in August, stay for max 3 months. That would be just so much fun!!! I never was in the USA. Maybe there will be some member from this forum living close and we could meet too. The road to hell says my dad..lol but my sister is so happy on the pictures she showed me when she was with him and he's loving family so I can never think it can be bad for her. She just glowed. They are a christian community too but way different. They have no clothes rules either and are not controlling of their members. My sister is only 19 yo but she is quite a clever girl.
    We was kind of joking to build a ranch over there.. our own small paradise. Who knows..

    I so understand you dreaming about moving to Germany! I love those small towns too.. and how nice people are. And how good they take care of everything there, and they are respectful to nature too. Very lovely.
    Has your hubby never been there?

    Hope.. can you tell me more about why it is "crazy" over there in the USA? Is it the same everywhere or is it only in the cities? What is the "crazyness" about?
    Here it is quite peaceful.. (if not counting the "mental" turmoil in family..lol) and I love it. I am kind of addicted to it actually. If I move anywhere I need it to be a peaceful place - absolutely. I cannot hear the "music" inside me (or is it the Schumann..?) otherwise.

    Ups I ramble in your journal Hope! I am sorry.... gotta stop this..huh.

    About how long I stay in my ice hole? I do at least 1 minute but also longer, 2-3-4-max 5 (once I did 7) but I usually do around 1,5-2 minutes. If I really do not feel like it I might do shorter but usually once I am in I could sit long! I just do not because the warming up after feels not too fun if my heart feels like it is partly frozen...lol If you want to do more I suggest to do many times in the day but shorter, not too long at once if the temps are as cold as in my hole and submerging your whole body. I think it is way safer. Maybe more effective too.
  16. cantweight

    cantweight Gold

    The beauty expressed in this journal just brought tears to my eyes. DH will come around Hope..he will be helped by what you do for yourself and perhaps that will stir his consciousness. At times when I was drowning in the environment of my old house it was too hard too see anything. Sometimes I felt like a malcontent, nothing I had was good enough....I was just a big fat complainer with no energy to do anything about it.

    I can't wait until we meet. I am a believer that everyone comes to each other for a reason...we have much in common. Perhaps we have great things to learn from each other :)
  17. Hope

    Hope Gold

    Kristi (or Christi? sorry I forget), thanks for your encouragement....so kind of you. I do see that DH is too tired all the time. He'd never confess it but falls asleep quickly with the TV on. Sadly he spends a lot of time at night on the PC, goes to sleep after me....it is breaking my heart. Also, I have been sickly (or lacking energy) ever since soon after we married...and just gotten worse, especially since we moved to DC so I haven't been the right model, the attractive person that makes him ask 'how do I get that too'? He actually told me twice now I shouldn't 'listen to that stuff so much' - i.e. our webinars here, and Q&A's. It's just too inconvenient for him, I think, too....but I hope SOME DAY soon I will be better and he will come around. I know - in my heart - he is somewhat imprisoned by his past and all the EMF he's getting at work all day, and then in the 1.5 hour drive to work and back. The only thing.....he IS catching on to grass fed butter - has no problem spending the extra money - and thankfully he loves all the seafood I make as well.

    And yes I can't wait to meet you either.....what you did - right in my area - is giving me great hope. And inspiration!

    Now I'm off to talk to the EMF expert for some specific questions....I so hope he can help me reduce our magnetic fields.....
  18. Hope

    Hope Gold

    Dear Inger,

    First, please NEVER apologize writing anything. Every word from you is a great gift.

    You have no idea how healing it is for me to hear your words…even though I am sad for your experience in your family. It actually helps me have more compassion for my DH, as I believe his upbringing was similarly ‘stifling’. Everything he does always has to be perfect….and I believe it’s from fear of criticism or discipline. And he can’t see it. But I can but only now…not the first several years. I think I was too blinded lol. But it’s the same with me – when I don’t do something they like, they don’t treat you nicely….in a weird, indirect way. Where my mom would yell at me, they do it in a passive aggressive way. Ugh.

    Your heart is beautiful, Inger, as is your humility. I get angry sometimes, sometimes over silly things, mostly because of my ego is unhappy about something that happened. But nature definitely helps me too. I wish I could live much closer to it. Or sleep outside, but there is too much light from all the neighbors…

    I am so sorry for what you have to witness with your parents. They sound like a cult, though that sounds like an awful thing to say (now I am cruel). I mean it is so against freedom, and that is what it’s all about…freedom. This isn’t freedom, you get blessed when you obey your PARENTS….are they God now? I am sorry, Inger. I just feel sad. This is not a good example. I went to Catholic school with nuns, though I’m not Catholic. But you know I felt free there, I loved school LOL (I loved to study, even more than going shopping. I was such a nerd). Maybe bc my mom was stricter than they seemed? I don’t know but I loved the education I got there. The biggest, #1 lesson I got is – to always think critically, for yourself…..

    About foods – I always wonder why so many “Christians” eat so much sugar and so on. And you know, I think it’s partly because there is so little sweetness in their lives in general, and this is one acceptable way to get it. I can’t imagine God being happy or blessing this. I mean, the legalistic believers get sick and die as anyone else does who doesn’t believe. And Jesus, he didn’t eat a lot of sugar. He wasn’t fat, I am sure. I am just so sorry you have had to experience such a harsh, painful picture of ‘religion’. It is so sad with your mentally ill brother too. I wonder how people can live like that, for the superficial things. Though I see a lot of that in the US – in general. It is very difficult as I am not superficial at all. The whole idea of ‘small talk’, or even the question “how are you” – it means nothing so why say “how are you” rather than “hello”. It’s weird to me.

    But perhaps your parents have tried to deal with his illness by telling themselves what they are, because really facing and doing all you can to help him – like feeding his brain in the best ways – is too hard? And especially with YOU in their midst…I wonder if they really fully recognize the incredible gift you are to them? Your knowledge could help him so much. And everyone. How great your family seems open at least to EMF testing! You said,

    the funny thing is - it all depends on how we look at stuff that is for sure! That is the secret and I know it is true even if I do not always succeed.

    And that is so so true…I love that.

    Your sister sounds lovely, and lucky. Clothes rules? Your family gave you clothes rules? Wow. I do hope you come to the US. You have all of us as friends….my home is always open to you and your sister too…though we live right outside Washington DC, an EMF bathtub. I am still dreaming of having a Jack Kruse Optimal Retreat where we all eat and CT and chat together etc. Wouldn’t that be neat? I have been called crazy by many friends…..but I have always known the truth in my heart about nature and EMF…I think I have been sensitive all my life. I now believe my grandfather – the strict father – who used to have his own radio repair shop in East Germany – died of cancer at age 70 maybe from all those frequencies. He built his own TV remote control, in East Germany. So he was smart too, not just super strict. Anyway.

    Yes, Germany is lovely and you know I took it all for granted growing up. It’s not perfect of course. My DH has been with me to Germany three times, and I took him to my hometown, which he said was his favorite place (!!!!!), even though it was small. We will go back for vacation, but I am not sure about living. I want to save money and eventually buy an apartment on the Baltic Sea, on the island of Usedom. My mom introduced me to it and we will go in May. I can’t wait. I feel like paradise. I don’t need Hawaii or Jamaica, it’s glorious there with the beach, the sand, the water, the seagulls, the good food. I feel so calm. You can walk everywhere….tiny town but just so lovely. So I dream some day we buy a place there, to go on vacation each year and then retire for 6 months. Some people go to Florida I go there, LOL. DH is too scared I think bc of the language. His grandpa was much more adventurous. He’s more like his mom, lots of anxiety. I moved to the US at age 22, all by myself, with nothing but a dream of living here. And I did…..so we are different there. His parents I think made him scared. He is such a perfectionist, everything must be perfect, and you know he is NOT free. He is a prisoner….of his own mind. I am too in some ways but learning how to be more free. More DHA and electrons are helping me get there. It really is all about the brain. ☺

    By Crazy I meant, mostly in bigger cities. I have lived in northeast cities, and they are all so busy, DC for me is the worst I think bc of EMF. People just rush everywhere. Many don’t take vacations. You can get maybe 10-15 days here per year if you work, it isn’t much and they complain about Germans getting 6 weeks, they call is socialism. To me it’s just smart as people are healthier and live better and use less healthcare like that. When you look at chronic diseases, the rates here are twice as high as in Europe, and there is a reason. Not just EMF but also stress, the way of life, at least in big cities. Like in Washington DC, SO many huge roads, drivers are rude here, not little towns but one area flows into another, nothing is defined and cute. Mostly strip malls, with huge shopping malls and stores, you get dizzy at all the stuff they sell. I like the little ones, little stores, cars, houses, etc. There are little towns too. I went to college in one and that’s what I fell in love with. I used to eat with all the international students…so much fun. All languages and accents from all over the world.

    But there are of course many great places in nature. There are some crazy religious people too. There are some small towns where it is still different, too. Like Asheville in the south is a cute place, or old towns on the shores, like in New Jersey, are kind of cute…..but generally everything is just so BIG here, and I am used to small LOL. One dear friend from college is from Moscow and he’d die in a small town, he needs his NYC. But he is paying for it…only 44 and has emphysema, from a lot of smoking too.

    I think you can totally have a farm here. You can do anything, Inger. Once you figure it out, you will make it happen. Your heart is leading you the right way and always will. Do you have a life dream for yourself, regardless of where you are now? What do you imagine your life like in five years?

    OK I better stop. I wrote so much. I hope to hear from you ☺ feel free to write anything. I love it all, truly.
  19. Hope

    Hope Gold


    :) forgot to mention....yes I have some Coconut Manna from Nutiva. Right now, can't seem to get it down. :(

    And don't worry about your age....at all. You know my mom is just in her late 70s and she often mentions, she was 60. :) You have another several decades to live optimal
  20. Hope

    Hope Gold

    So we got the magnetico pads tonight. Such hard work and hope we did it right. DH asked several times if I really want to do it. I am so tired now. But it's all good. I can't wait to see if it makes a difference....I hope so so much.

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