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Coming soon! My first child.

Discussion in 'Optimal Kids' started by enyaw, Sep 13, 2012.

  1. enyaw

    enyaw Gold

    My wife and I are due to have our first born in January. Our plan is to breastfeed, then introduce an epi-paleo diet all while establishing a set feeding/playing/sleeping schedule. Having been in the Marine Corps infantry, I know that the first casualty of war is the plan. Does anyone have advice on when to wean from breastfeeding, what baby's first foods should be, getting baby on a schedule, cold, or any other advice we should consider on our adventure?
  2. Jack Kruse

    Jack Kruse Administrator

    congrats and I like your plan!
  3. Shijin13

    Shijin13 Guest

    WHO recommends a child should nurse until at least age 2 - any nursing beyond that is based upon the comfort of the mother and child (I'm still nursing my ds who's 2 &1/2 - I've been working on weaning for over 6mths - I'm ready for him to be done but he's not - he knows what he needs so he still nurses)

    Avoid schedules - scheduling babies interferes w/breastfeeding success. Consider safe co-sleeping arrangements (makes it easier on mom and baby and builds the nursing relationship much quicker - LLL, Dr Sears and Mothering.com talk about safe methods for co-sleeping)

    first foods, egg yolk, meats, veggies(only what's in season at the time) - wait on fruits until later (after 1yr)

    Start going to a La Leche League meetings, educate your self about birth and the birthing process. Consider having a MW deliver your child, and hire a Doula to support both you and your wife during labor.

    Books I recommend:

    anything by Ina May Gaskin - here's her website http://www.inamay.com/ she's a leading Midwife - she runs the Farm in TN. I've known women who've delivered with her.

    Watch the documentary the business of being born.

    Any books by Dr. Sears -

    Consider taking a birthing class like Bradley (Forewarning there are some OBs that won't take you as a client if you use bradley), Hypnobirthing, hypnobabies - these classes involve the father in the birthing process and give the mother ownership of her childs birth.
    enyaw likes this.
  4. ...what she said! As a mom of three and a natural childbirth teacher (Bradley et al), you can have a schedule...it will just be dictated by baby! Their innate wisdom is more reliable than ours at this point. Breast feed AS LONG AS POSSIBLE! Do not let your doc pressure u to introduce solids too early. When baby is interested, it will eat...and that is the right time. Again, it may be new to this world but it has millions of years of evolutionary wisdom within its cells.
    enyaw likes this.
  5. 1. Family Bed!

    2. Family Bed!

    3. Eat around baby, baby will start reaching for for YOUR foods when ready. Give tiny amounts of whatever you are eating (assuming epi-paleo). You can even pre-chew (read about this before balking!) on things if you feel the need. Blendingand over processed food is such a new invention for babies. Totally unnecessary. Baby will start wanting more of your food, less of mommies. We seem to be built from 2-4 yrs of breastfeeding - it's unclear what ideal/optimal is, so go with your primal sense for your baby :)

    4. No experience with this, but would love to hear on how baby falls into a good schedule with proper circadian input.

    Most importantly relax about it all! All babies eventually learn to eat and potty. They are born with programming for things like sleep and love (did I mention family bed!).

    Don't get caught up in sending baby away from the tribe to try and get on some schedule you determine all by themselves. . .so unatural.

    Annnnnnnd, family bed. I totally think kids should have a room/bed - but should be a full member of the family (tribe) until they are ready for their privacy.
    enyaw likes this.

  6. I agree, if you are providing good input (circadian natural environment and epi-paleo foods for the tribe) then I bet baby has a better sense for what's best than you two ever will.
  7. nonchalant

    nonchalant Silver

    Congratulations, MooseMan, that's wonderful news!
  8. CarolMorris

    CarolMorris New Member

    Congratulations such an exciting time of life!
  9. Caroline Cooper

    Caroline Cooper New Member

    It is a very happy time to be welcoming a child into the world. Congratulations. This would be my advice to a new father:

    1. Try to give the new mother as much support as possible. Birth and breastfeeding is very stressful on a women's body.

    2. Makes sure she has the best food possible and lots of rest. Try to reduce sources of stress before the baby comes. You partner's quality of milk will directly come from her quality of food.

    3. After the baby comes, consider a babymoon at home, which is one to three weeks of reduced activity and few or no visitors. (This also reduces the chance of infection.)

    4. Encourage your partner to breastfed longer. Many people breastfed for a few weeks to six months. A year or more would be better for your child.

    5. This is the Weston A Price Foundation's baby feeding schedule:


    It is a very personal decision, but the place to give birth is where your partner feels safest. I had two home births with a midwife. I would highly recommend using a midwife and having a home birth, if that is something that your partner would want. (Home births have similar outcomes to hospital births but lower rates of infection.) Co-sleeping is another personal choice. I did it but sometimes I wished I hadn't because it negatively effected my sleep. I breastfed both my children on demand. Sonja self-weaned at two years. I weaned Erika at three years. Again, every family is in a unique situation and has to make there own decisions about these important choices.

    Here are some of my favorite essay from the Weston A Price Foundation
    . They have some great ideas about first foods that I wish I had known about when I had my children:


    Good luck. Having children is a wonderful experience. It's not always easy but it is always rewarding.
  10. Zorica Vuletic

    Zorica Vuletic New Member

    Congrats on the happy news!

    You know it's funny, since becoming healthier and healthier as a result of this website etc. I have really been feeling the effects of 'biological clock' and wanting kids. This is in stark contrast to my severe aversion to wanting any kids at all from even a year ago.

    I started getting positive thoughts in about June. Now I've decided that it would be the right thing for me. Ok, so I need to find a suitable partner, LOL, I think this will change my perspective in who I select though.

    It's as if I want to say 'thank you' to Jack and everyone for giving me what I consider a freedom. I feel more grounded and centred so as a result I feel more confident that there would be success with having kids.
    enyaw likes this.
  11. TribalSpice

    TribalSpice New Member

    Massive congrats!

    If you only read one thing about birth, let it be this: http://www.joyousbirth.info/articles/ecstatic.html It is a brilliant article on birth and hormones etc. Be aware that how your wife births impacts breastfeeding and the health of your baby. It is a time when bubs hormonal system will be to some extent "set", a base level of receptors will develop in that first 24 hours on the outside. Being on this site means you must understand the gravity of that for you baby's future health. As Caroline mention, home might be the best place for you bub to enter the world.

    With breastfeeding, support, support, support and allow mum and bub as much time doing skin to skin contact as possible. Allow bub to attach to the breast on their own terms, especially the first time. Forcing babies on the breast can be one of the most detrimental things to do to a breastfeeding relationship.

    With introducing solids, it really isn't that important in the first 12 months, bub will get their nutrition from breastmilk and any food play, is more a learning experience than a nutritional need.

    Enjoy it, parenting is a great experience, birth is amazing, babies are magical and kids are so much fun.
    enyaw likes this.

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