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ColdBren's Journal

Discussion in 'My Optimal Journal' started by ColdBren, Apr 27, 2012.

  1. ColdBren

    ColdBren New Member

    Very true kate! I do need to remember and focus on the progress!
     
  2. LinD

    LinD New Member


    What is that---heart of the rose technique? Sound lovely.



    EDIT: from the Monk book, right? I found something else you posted about it. I need to read that! I've always marveled at how God put together flowers, fruit, and people!





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  3. LinD

    LinD New Member


    I am curious about these night time panic attacks you mention... Did this occur while sleeping or awake? Would you mind elaborating?



    I've had a strange thing happening at night for years now while sleeping that awakens me in a panic looking for my rings (on my fingers)... To where I actually get up and look for them in my jewelry box. The episodes have decreased, plus I stopped wearing them at night which seems to have helped except I panicked a couple of weeks ago when I didn't even have the rings on... very weird. Would you classify this as a panic attack?



    I recently started using phosphatidyserine about a week ago, and the blue-blocker glasses for the last four nights.





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  4. ColdBren

    ColdBren New Member


    Lin-the first time I did the flower exercise where you are just supposed to focus on the flower...I cried....I couldn't believe the beauty, fragility...etc....what I had been overlooking forever!



    As for my panic attacks, yes I am asleep when they hit, waking me up to a full rush of adrenalin and doom. Its so interesting that you go to your rings...I wonder what they symbolize for you....I bet if you really analyze it you may find it has nothing to do with the rings. Maybe if you figure it out you can resolve what you mind is trying to bring up to you. As for the physiological part, phosphatideserine has made the most positive difference out of anything I have tried over the years....and the blockers too!
     
  5. ColdBren

    ColdBren New Member

    Oh also Lin- I just remembered sometimes my panic episodes at night have involved my ring. I think maybe at night there is some kind of swelling in the fingers which may be triggering your mind to draw your attention to your fingers as the ring seems to be strangling the finger. This may be why it has gotten better after taking them off?
     
  6. LinD

    LinD New Member

    CB, thanks for your reply. I lost 40# or so and the rings were getting loose, so it was kind of the opposite.



    Also, the diamond was my deceased mothers. I actually found it when I was 18 yo and moving to Denver. She hid it quite well before she took her life 10 years prior to me finding it in the dresser that ended up in my bedroom. Weird... It just fell into my lap as I was cleaning out the drawers in preparation of moving.



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  7. ColdBren

    ColdBren New Member

    wow, it must have some deep meaning
     
  8. LinD

    LinD New Member


    IDK, but maybe the abandonment and loss of a mother at such a young age (8), plus the fact she took her own life. (PLUS, I find the one carat ring that she hid before she took her life that horrible night in New Orleans where we lived.) Makes for a bittersweet Mother's Day, for sure, even though it was 42 years ago. I have a 20 year old daughter.



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  9. ColdBren

    ColdBren New Member

    Ohmigosh Lin, I am so sorry. The panic events seem to make perfect sense in the light of all of that. I am so very sorry for 8 year old Lin, that is just never supposed to happen to a little girl. I am glad the episodes have decreased. I wonder if they are triggered now by emotional stress or physiological changes (hormones, cycle).
     
  10. TerrierMom

    TerrierMom Gold

    I have this at times too... Struggled with depression, then anxiety and panic attacks. Got a lot of help from the infomercial product Lucinda Bassett sells on tv.. 'overcoming anxiety and depression'... Some of the takeaways were: keep blood sugar stable. (by eating protein at every meal and avoiding sugar and alcohol, avoid caffiene, eating regular meals). Self-soothing thoughts (it matters what you say when you talk to yourself)... Moderate exercise daily (strolling)... If I do these things (even before paleo) it was great help. Slip up and I paid the price.



    Elsewhere I came to understand that panic is an adrenal thing, chronic stress has your poor amygdala thinking a lion is coming to eat you and is stuck in "on" mode, pumping out adrenaline inappropriately for what's going on.... And stress, including of the dietary variety, keeps it going.



    In the last year I've been frequently getting the 'wake up at 3 and be wide awake til 5:30' thing.... Always with a bit of a palpitation and a few times, with my heart pounding so hard you could hear it in my breathing (cut my breath off with every beat). Fraking scary!. Not sure where I read it here (forum, blog post, or blog comment) but what I understand this to be is, about that time of night your blood sugar naturally is at its lowest. Normal bodies pump out a little cortisol to crank up the blood sugar. Out of whack bodies pump out too much...or if no cortisol is available, it pumps out pure adrenaline instead. (nightmares, doom, palpitations.... Sound familiar?)



    Pretty sure jacks hormone and adrenal blogs say we need to tighten our circadian rhythms especially the light dark cycle...still hunting around for more info and action plan! So rare to sleep all night and I'd sure like to do that and I bet you would too! Looking into the salivary cortisol test to see what's going on with me...have you done that yet?
     
  11. ColdBren

    ColdBren New Member

    Yep! That sure does sound familiar....and awful. I did the cortisol and it was too low in the morning and too high at night. Tightening up my circadian rhythm has really helped. After 20 years of researching and trying to find answers for all of this, this site has given me more accurate insight than all of my searching. I know what you mean about the pounding heart....pure adrenalin is right...if only we could tell our brains it is really not necessary at 3 am. lol
     
  12. TerrierMom

    TerrierMom Gold

    I've heard others note that ct in the morning raises cortisol and helps reset them, then they sleep like a rock at night. And without morning ct no good sleep. Would take some lifestyle changes to work that out but I'm willing to give it a shot!! Do you use the blue blocker glasses?
     
  13. ColdBren

    ColdBren New Member

    You know....I think that has been the case with me too...morning CT brings a good day and good sleep. But, if I CT closer to night time, I am in panic trouble. Yes I have religiously used the glasses for a couple months and they seem to bring the cortisol down as well.
     
  14. skywaykate

    skywaykate Gold


    I need to try this. My cortisol is low all day but mostly in the am. I think it used to be high at night but I've been working on it/maybe I'm more burned out.



    The saliva test is really interesting. Also told me I'm very high in gluten antibodies, so I've been gluten free about 3 weeks longer than I've been doing the LR. Something is helping bc in general I've had an uptick in energy. But activity later at night can keep me up for a while, eg moving around much after some "husband-wife time"...happened last night, thought I just had to refill my water bottle for today and get a glass of water, but spilled a bunch plus had to put away dinner. Was up for another hour and a half, wired, but tired. Also used to get wired after being woken in the middle of the night by my daughters, to the point that I would just plan in it, but that is bad for sleeping.



    Will see about am CTing tomorrow!



    sent from my phone while wrangling at least 1 toddler...expect typos, smile when you see them...the toddlers or the typos
     
  15. ColdBren

    ColdBren New Member


    I am interested in how it goes!!
     
  16. ColdBren

    ColdBren New Member

    My doctor informed me I have Hashimotos today :( I guess it makes sense, I definitely struggle with losing weight. I am just starting to learn about what it really means and I don't like it. My own body attacking my thyroid? wth... I started asking my doc. if that meant I should avoid eggs and tomatoes...and she looked at me blankly and said.....don't worry about the diet it's not a part of this. She tried to put me on synthetic thyroid and I asked about natural stuff (still not really knowing what I am talking about) She said like Armour? I remember someone on this site talking about it so I decided that would be better. If anyone has any experience on it I would love to hear about it. She put me on 15 mg or mcg I dont remember. I read somewhere that if you are on too low of a dose you actually feed the problem....anyone have any opinions on this?
     
  17. ealachan

    ealachan New Member


    Oh, that's a bummer. *hugs*
     
  18. LinD

    LinD New Member


    You need to communicate with Colleen Coble on this. She is a jewel.



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  19. LinD

    LinD New Member

    Coldbren, I know how infuriating it is to find out your own body is attacking itself. I was diagnosed with MS in 1990 at age 28.



    The good news is that I more aware of what it takes for good health and always searching to learn more. Hence, here I am! Also, while I have MS, it doesn't have me. I've been blessed the MS doesn't have control.



    Also, I've learned to rely more on God and not all on myself. After all, He is really in control.



    Take a deep breath.



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  20. ColdBren

    ColdBren New Member

    Thanks Lin, I needed that advice this very moment....your post made me realize I need to stop trying to solve t all right now....and go to sleep. I think God worked through you on that one.
     

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