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Alyson at 2800 feet

Discussion in 'My Optimal Journal' started by alyson thiessen, May 19, 2015.

  1. Joe Gavin

    Joe Gavin Face Everything And Rise

    All great stuff Alyson. Loving it all.
    Mystic Rose60 likes this.
  2. Mystic Rose60

    Mystic Rose60 Let the sun shine on you :))

    Yes Alyson! You can do this! ((HUGS))
    alyson thiessen likes this.
  3. Jack Kruse

    Jack Kruse Administrator

    I thought about what you wrote last night as I slept. Do you awaken just from a type of sleep? Modern life has managed to numb our senses while we are conscious. Maybe your family early family was helpful in training you to be submissive to control the animal within? The more you contain an animal they more ferocity they use to escape. The more risks they take. But the risks are often taken at the wrong time for the wrong reasons. Don't let risks taken at the wrong time harness your adventurous exploration. Where's your sense of adventure, right now Alyson? It is buried in your passion here...........where you write about you. Might it have died in a way under mysterious circumstances you shared? I think so. A kind of light spread out from us when we rejoin life; And everything seems to changed color in some small way. I sense this is where your headed now. Your struggling because youre a buxom blonde that evolved in blue lit world, and the purple/red youre beginning to see with your blue adapted eyes is confusing to your perception as you awaken. Youre beginning to see your true colors. Inside, the blue made you ugly but you are beginning to sense your pretty solid in a purple red world. You have to protect that vision now.

    The world is beginning to open inside out and the fog on your eye lifts so you can see the new world order unfolding in front of you now. We already contain everything we need, Alyson. You need no drugs, no supplements, no cryotherapy. There is no need for self-improvement. These trips we lay on our psyche are like clouds that temporarily block the sun. But all the time our warmth and brilliance remain around us hidden from perception. This is who we really are. We are one blink of an eye away from being fully awake.
    Joe Gavin, cinnamon, Lahelada and 4 others like this.
  4. This is precisely where I am at now. And you hit the nail on the head....the animal within....I am fierce and want to escape. And I believe it's happened. No more waiting, no more talking, no more writing about it. And yes, the vision I am getting seems preposterous to my mind...but my soul says "yes". My heart says," of course"......my body...well..my body is still confused but it's coming around.

    I know you are trying to say something with the 'sense of adventure'....I know where it died. But let's just say, I believe in resurrection. :)

    Thank you for the love. I feel it. I am wanting it. I want to spread it.

    And thank you for the post on Harm yday on FB.

    I dreamed 2 nights ago I was diving in the ocean...warm ocean. I was actually snorkelling and dove great depths past those with scuba gear on. No fear....total liberation .... this I believe is significant.

    Thank you Jack for helping me. (as she writes with tears of joy streaming down her face....)
    Joe Gavin and endless like this.
  5. Hansen Kenimer

    Hansen Kenimer New Member

    You have a new family here, Alyson. We love you.
  6. Inger

    Inger Silver

    Yes Alison.... we are your new family :love: ((((hugs))))

    This is weird.... because I often think about it... exactly that..... ^^^
    alyson thiessen, Joe Gavin and nicld like this.
  7. Thank you all.....seriously.

    All I wanted to do today was wake up and write in this blog that "yay...it's all good, I feel great......boom"....and that is SO not the case. Spent the night circling the drain....no sleep...demons dancing in my head. And I had plenty of thoughts....Most of them unproductive...but here was the one that kind of haunted me:

    "what is Jack saying......??????? He keeps saying I am not who I think I am......"..........

    and I am not.

    Is this the pain I continually feel??? Is the construct I fabricated called my own environment body/mind/soul just a coping mechanism....is my 'kick ass attitude" a total lie? is this just my ferocity to be free....but when in fact maybe I am sensitive and delicate and lovely. Maybe I am nice and gentle....what if this isn't me? Am I like the pit bull that is trained to be fierce?

    And if this isn't me? Who the heck am I? And all I can think of is a time when life was innocent and ok......I don't have that time but I want to think I was an innocent beautiful girl that wanted a voice. And because Ihad no voice my own voice had to get louder.

    This is the question......who am I in the red/purple glow of the truth. I feel broken but I am hanging on to truth. I am hanging on to principals. And I might feel broken. But I am not.

    If I wasn't a 'geterdonegirl" and I wasn't kick ass.....who would I be?

    Here is the vision that has always been in my mind. FOREVER. I have always wanted to live far from the maddening crowd...and be self sustaining. And live a simple life. I have always wanted to lie in the sun and help people near and far....what do I want to help them with? Seeing their self worth. Funny. My tattoo on my back is "inspire".....the tattoo on my wrist is Freedom and Love. I really want to write and I want to coach. This is what I've always wanted...when I went to University I went for journalism and slipped into Economics...b/c it was easy for me and family approved....but I dream of the esoteric ...I dream of witches and potions and how things work and then, how they don't. I dream of the moon and the tides and why darkness is given such a bad wrap. I dream not of greatness....I dream of gentle wakings....loving hugs....I dream of helping those that can't help themselves.....yes....I lost my dream in it's finality when I was 19. I felt called to go to Nicaragua and volunteer....I felt compelled....MUST....my dad said, "not this year Alyson...."........dream died forever....and I let it die. I take ownership of that. But truly...my push is to get south. My push is to figure this out......and here is the thing.....I can't be patient with it. I must pursue....my life truly depends on it....if I didn't have kids last night might have ended up badly......but I must figure this out so I can help them. I can understand them. I can be there for them...in a loving gentle way. I'm adventuring into me......thank you all again for reading.

    Your support means so much. This is a wonderful place to be...to be me.
  8. Joe Gavin

    Joe Gavin Face Everything And Rise

    All good stuff Babe!! You're words speak to me on what I've been journey-ing on this year. De-pussfication. Brutal honesty with my self. Acceptance of the my past. Acceptance of my character defects [I've learned recently I'm co-dependent!! Awesome shit! :) I see sooo many things I can do with that in a POSITIVE way now!].

    Be you're dream Alyson! Be it now. Everything is an illusion, so might as well make it YOUR illusion! As Jack wrote, awakening can happen in blink of the eye.

    I ran across this an article on Stocism and perhaps you can find this quote helpful as you bring it all together (and you will!):

    "Any misfortune ‘that lies outside the sphere of choice’ should be considered an opportunity to strengthen our resolve, not an excuse to weaken it. This is one of the truly great mind-hacks ever devised, this willingness to convert adversity to opportunity, and it’s part of what Seneca was extolling when he wrote what he would say to one whose spirit has never been tempered or tested by hardship: ‘You are unfortunate in my judgment, for you have never been unfortunate. You have passed through life with no antagonist to face you; no one will know what you were capable of, not even you yourself.’ We do ourselves an immense favour when we consider adversity an opportunity to make this discovery – and, in the discovery, to enhance what we find there."

    All love honey! It's all coming together! Look at this time as a the well of the horseshoe: we start high on the left, hit some rough patches in the middle, then use all of our tools to climb out the right side. We all have a PhD in pain; let's use it for our benefit! Call whenever you need!
    alyson thiessen likes this.
  9. Joe....I want to adopt you as my brother. UP for it? I love you man and you are such a phenomenal friend. Thank you...the quote is stellar ....
    Joe Gavin likes this.
  10. And just for the record...I am open for adoption and for adopting.
    Joe Gavin and endless like this.
  11. Jack Kruse

    Jack Kruse Administrator

    That vision in your mind requires action. You are devoid of passion because your ideation is without execution........and that has lead to deletion of your ideas and vision. This is the source of your discontent. You have not prioritized things in your life.

    Sentiment without action is the ruin of passion. Without passion some present their ruins as new castles and become empty people. Without passion, all you attain is money and fame; what comes next? You should expect scandal and shame. There is no hope or passion living large in the midst of ruin. Lightening has the power to create and destroy objects. Action, in life, is like lightening. Emulate lightning because it has the ability to animate or destroy one's life; it's up to us which side we choose to act like.

    New idea’s can be quite fragile at their outset. When we first unleash them on the world they can be minimized by a "yawn"; they can also be slowly bleed to death by a sharp comment, or killed by a facial frown. But when an idea is really special, it is a rude awakening to the new dawn's sleepy eyes. A new idea is like a beautiful sunrise; it begins whispering to the world that something new is happening on the world's stage for the very first time. It's time for you to wipe the sandman from your eyes and wake up to this reality. Put some action behind you vision and watch your power animate your vision.
    Last edited: Oct 28, 2015
    cinnamon and alyson thiessen like this.
  12. Thank you for this .... There is so much here. "I was presenting my ruins as new castles......"....

    The new dawn is happening.....
    Last edited by a moderator: Oct 28, 2015
  13. Jack Kruse

    Jack Kruse Administrator

  14. Joe Gavin

    Joe Gavin Face Everything And Rise

    Great read! Was my issue for a long long time. So now I've spent the money on a nutrition/coaching course (which is of course lacking the light angle but is giving me a great base on all the energy pathways) and will fold into the light-water-magnetism-Quantlet learnings here and become a light guru. You're latest post pulled it all together in the Ubi Rx. it's all there and needs to be communicated widely and lived bravely.

    I've already secured two website domains as a starting point, have a couple of friends that will help me get them up and running and Just Fucking Do It. It doesn't have to be pretty, it just has to get done. No more fear about being weird, different or alien. Just a passion to change the fucking world. You know, something small :)

    Thanks for the words!
  15. Jack Kruse

    Jack Kruse Administrator

    I tell everyone to just begin.......you dont have to do things correctly or right.........eventually if your moving you will adjust unless your dead. The key is you get no where mentally masturbating which is what most people do because their priorities suck.

    When I realize in a journal your priorities are more important than optimal I won't be posting in it much and I won't post most to and from you.

    I move on quickly
    alyson thiessen likes this.
  16. Inger

    Inger Silver

    alyson thiessen likes this.
  17. Jack Kruse

    Jack Kruse Administrator

  18. Alyson, Reading through all that's been going on for you, I just wish to extend an energetic hug to you. So much!

    If you are interested in doing any internal journeying to clear energetic blocks that are in place in your system, let me know. I'd love to gift you with a healing session, and you might be quite surprised at how much you can see and subsequently clear in one session. If you are interested, let me know. I can feel how much you want to free of all this shit, and I would love to work with you.
    alyson thiessen, endless and cinnamon like this.
  19. What a beautiful offer....thank you. I appreciate this and yes, let's see what we can do :)
  20. So let's reiterate.

    Get out of your own way. Figure it out and now....

    Stop talking. Do.

    On it.

    Thank you for the love.
    Joe Gavin likes this.

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